Bring Him Home

Another Hurdle...

2010-01-12T00:31:00.009-06:00

Hi friends, it's been awhile. It becomes increasingly more difficult to sit down and blog, as it seems like there's never much good news. Sometimes I feel guilty and feel like I am disappointing people as this fight goes on and on...with no end in sight. Last year at this time we were all believing that it was almost over. That was before the bomb fell and our collective hearts were shattered and torn. The wounds are still healing, and the war is still raging. I still need your courage, your confidence, your faith. I still need you in my corner.

In October I was able to go down and see Will. It seemed fairly uneventful...Will is getting so big now, it's hard to remember him as the scared little boy in the corner who would barely utter a word. Now he is full of life, full of confidence, full of hope. Since Esteban is gone, the relationship between my son and I is so much stronger. We don't have as many arguments, for now we don't have someone stirring up the confusion and mistrust. It has been a joy to see our relationship grow, I love my son more than ever.

My lawyer is still working on fixing Will's birth father's certificate. It has taken such a long time. Nubia is in the process of finding three witnesses who knew Will's birth dad and are able to testify in court. If we get a favourable result from the judge, we can finally move on to presenting my documents to the government. Please pray that this can happen this month.

In another strange occurrence, every government worker within the office of the Ministry of the Family was 'let go' in late September. The government has now replaced them with new workers from the Sandinista Party, as Daniel Ortega moves closer to having his dictatorship. Every adoption case that was in process is now forced to start from scratch...families are devastated as they lose years of work. Thankfully, because my docs haven't been presented yet, I'm still in a good position. My lawyer has also told me that the new workers have no idea what they are doing, so they have asked her to come in and help them learn the ropes, as she is well respected within the adoption community. This could be a blessing, if she can have influence within the walls of the government offices.

In some startling news, while I was in Veracruz I received a summons to appear in court. I was being brought to court by a family who I have known and served over the past 12 years. They have been assisting us with our Project Serve teams since 2002. It seems due to another set of lies from Esteban, they didn't get paid adequately for their work last February. They brought me to court to settle the debt. With my lawyer we were able to settle the matter outside of court, and so I was assuming it was all good. Apparently not...

As I tried to book a room at the orphanage for my upcoming visit at the end of January, I was told that I was not allowed back at the orphanage...I was shocked by this, and when I asked why, I received another shocker. I was told that the day I left Nicaragua last October, the police arrived at the orphanage with an immigration order restricting my travel from Nicaragua. But I was already on my way. Until my name is cleared, I am considered a threat to the safety of the kids at the orphanage. I was told that if the people who are after me come to the orphanage to find me, it could put the kids at risk.

I have no idea who did this, but obviously I was devastated by this horrific news. I asked my friend Juan to investigate and speak with my lawyer, with the hopes of finding the root of this problem. After some digging, they have been unable to find who is directly responsible for this problem. All suspicions are with the family who were upset about the money issue, but it can't be proved yet. It is impossible to find answers from the police, as the information is confidential. To make matters worse, my lawyer does not want to poke around the Immigration office, as she does not want to tarnish her good standing with them.

In yet another unimaginable twist, it seems that family is still upset about how the money issue was handled and feel their reputation and integrity were questioned, so they have taken it upon themselves to begin to drag my name through the mud. Imagine, the same family who called me their son, their baby...the same family who I have served and blessed for over 12 years...have begun a smear campaign within Veracruz. They are apparently spreading viscous rumours and lies about me, telling people that I am an evil and immoral man who cannot be trusted. I don't know how far reaching this evil act is, but my lawyer is incredibly nervous about it. She says that this damaging testimony could destroy my chances of success with the adoption case. We are already in an uphill battle. Just my marital status alone will be a challenge enough for the adoption officials to get over...if the government believes the lies being spread about my character, that could really put to death all chances of a successful outcome.

My lawyer has advised me to hire another lawyer to deal with those two issues, so she can focus on fixing the certificates. This will also keep her good name out of the mix. She has also advised me not to return to Nicaragua as planned on Jan 31. With an immigration order out for me, leaving Nicaragua could be very difficult. She knows I want to go down and clear my name, but she told me to be patient as we sort out these confusing situations. I don't know what to do...the ticket has already been purchased and is non refundable...and my son desperately wants me there to celebrate his 16th birthday. I just don't know what to do.

Please pray that we could find out where this immigration order came from, and how to cancel it. Please pray that we could have an end to this smear campaign, and that no permanent damage will be done to my name and integrity. Pray that Nubia could have success in fixing the birth father's certificates. And please pray that God would give me wisdom and strength as I try and navigate more troubled waters. I am becoming despondent and hopeless at times...feeling like I don't have the courage to keep going. But I will continue to fight for my son...in the face of seemingly unrelenting adversity and opposition...I refuse to let the enemy win. We will have victory, let's claim that in the mighty name of Jesus.

Thanks for sticking with me.

Corwin

Not Much To Report

2009-09-27T14:11:00.002-06:00

Hi everyone, sorry for taking so long to update, but there just hasn't been much going on. The last post took alot out of me, and trying to find the desire to post again has taken some time. I know from the comments that there a couple of people who have expressed frustration with me because of the lack of posts, and even gone so far as to question my integrity and intentions because of what unfolded in spring. I'm not sure what to say to those individuals...but what I do know is that the support, love and encouragement from 99.9% of you has continued to be overwhelming, and so I cling to that and try to keep the negative words from bringing me down. Thank you again to all those who have stuck with me and who are still praying with me. Thanks for not giving up, even when updates are few and far between.

It has been difficult knowing what to say, especially when it seems like the process is stalled. The last update I heard from my lawyer is that she is still working on sorting out the problems with Will's birth father's birth certificate. I'm not sure why it takes so long to make a simple certificate, but I guess it's just the reality of the Nicaraguan legal system. So we can continue to pray that this certificate issue can be worked out soon, so we can actually proceed with the the adoption process. Pray that the judges involved will sense the significance of their decisions. Pray that my lawyer will be able to pour all of her energy into this process, and that we could get a glimmer of hope really soon.

Will is doing ok. I actually get to speak with him a few times a week, so that has been good. His English classes are going well, and I try to get him to practice his words with me. It is costing far less to meet his physical needs while he is at his aunt's house...it really has brought to light how much Esteban had twisted the truth regarding the cost of living there.

My plan is to return to Nicaragua in October to spend some time with my son, who I haven't seen since early June. I miss Will so much... This visit will also allow me to connect with my lawyer and see if there are things I can do to help expedite this process.

So that's it...nothing really to report, except to tell you that God has continued to work in my heart, providing me with peace and forgiveness. Some days it feels like this adoption will never happen, but I try to keep focused on God's promises, and the hope that we can cling to. Thanks again for you continued love and support.

God bless...
Corwin

The Truth Hurts; The Truth Heals

2009-06-16T02:41:00.003-06:00

Well, I’ve been searching desperately to find the right way to do this. This post is not easy to write, but I know I must write it. I can’t put it off anymore. No more stalling. No more excuses. It’s time. You deserve to know the truth. So here it is:

I was lied to. I was manipulated. I was deceived. I was robbed. Pure and simple. I was robbed…robbed of my time, robbed of my resources, robbed of my dignity, robbed of everything I hold dear. The unimaginable, the unthinkable, the unfathomable has happened.

After Esteban’s no show on the Sunday I arrived in Managua, I began to suspect something was not right. Something felt different, very different. It was an incredibly unsettling feeling. The fears and doubts that I had fought for so long were beginning to come alive like never before. But I still refused to believe…I kept holding on to hope…the hope and belief that my best friend and Nicaraguan brother was a good man, a trustworthy man, a loyal friend; the hope and belief that no human being could possess the capacity for such deception and malice. It was impossible. Or was it?

Wednesday, June 3, 2009, I finally learned the truth. I sat down with my lawyer in a crowded café in the heart of Managua, and slowly watched my entire world dissipate into dust. As we talked, it became evident that the one thing I had refused to believe was the new reality I needed to swallow. Esteban was not the man I thought he was. His deception runs deep and wide…it is unyielding and undeniable, and it’s scope is beyond imagination. Everything he has told me has apparently been a lie. There was no court last July, I never was granted custody. Will never appeared in any court. The crisis with the birth mother in January never happened, there was no final court. The adoption was never finalized. There were no documents, and therefore UPS never lost anything. Will was never living in Matagalpa the past 4 months; he was not attending high school in the morning and English school in the afternoon. He was, in fact, living in the ghetto with his aunt again. There were no extra judges or lawyers helping with the case. All those trips Esteban took into Managua that I paid for, those meetings with lawyers and government officials never happened. It never happened…

As my lawyer became aware of the lies I had been told, she became incredibly incensed. Esteban had used her as leverage in all this. She couldn’t believe that her good name had been used to perpetuate such deceit. Both of us couldn’t fathom what was happening…could someone really do this to another human being? I began to search for other possibilities, perhaps there was a good explanation…maybe this was just a big misunderstanding. Maybe my lawyer was lying to me…maybe she has ulterior motives…but then I stopped. The past year of my life began to flash before me. I began to recall the many conversations, the phone calls, the e-mails. I didn’t want to believe it, but I couldn’t ignore the truth any longer.

For the past few months I had fought the shadow of doubt. Secretly questioning, but outwardly defending. Many friends and family had tried to ask the question: “Can we trust Esteban?” I had been unwavering in my defense of him. I had spent so much time with this man…he had translated for two of my Project Serve teams…I felt like I sincerely knew him. He was my brother. He was committed to assisting me with this adoption. He was committed to my son. Of all the Nicaraguans I had ever come in contact with, I felt Esteban was the most trustworthy. Other friends of mine who had spent time with him confirmed this notion. And so I trusted. I wanted to trust…I needed to trust. This was my son’s life at stake, everything was on the line. There was no adoption agency, there was no one else who really knew my heart, who truly understood my passion for bringing my son home. I needed that one person to help me, to look out for my son, to help me communicate with my lawyer. 3000 miles from my son, attempting a seemingly impossible journey, thrown into unthinkable circumstances, I needed someone I could trust with my son’s life and this process. With Esteban I felt like I had found that person. I truly believed that God had brought him into our life for this purpose, that the intersection of our lives was part of a divine plan. I needed him. I trusted him.

And yet there were these shadows…the whole situation with the birth mother, my lawyer not being present at final court in January, the government randomly taking and releasing the final documents whenever they felt like it, UPS losing the docs, UPS saying the docs were delivered, never receiving scans of the docs as was promised, never having proof of the adoption… there were these shadows, but I had held on to my belief that Esteban was telling the truth. What would be gained from all these lies? It was inconceivable.

What about all the e-mails Wilber was sending me the past few months? He seemed to be enjoying school and his English was showing impressive improvements. But here again the deception runs deep. Esteban knew Will’s hotmail password, and was emailing me pretending to be Will, in order to maintain my confidence in the situation. This is the one lie that hurts the most…Will has explained that the past few months have been very difficult. He has been despondent and depressed thinking that I had forgotten about him, as we had no actual contact since the end of February. Here I was, thinking that I was corresponding through e-mails three times a week, when the reality was that Wilber was sitting in his aunt’s house wondering why I didn’t call. This kills me inside. This is where it hurts the most.

Of course there is also the financial reality of this story. You know very well that this adoption has been expensive, more so than I could have ever predicted. And now I understand why…the judges, the lawyers, the trials, the documents, the car rentals, the gas money, Will’s ‘expenses’, the school fees…it goes on and on. The reality is this: it would now seem that none of that money, or very little of it, actually made it to where it was supposed to be going. In 15 months, close to $15,000…gone, with nothing to show for it. I tried to do everything right, but in the end my naivety and my trusting spirit cost me more than I could have imagined. It is like a nightmare I can’t wake from.

So I sat there in that small café, face to face with this new reality, trying to make sense of what was happening. I was flooded with a thousand different emotions. What was I going to do? But then the most amazing thing occurred: I felt at peace. I felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I actually felt a sense of relief. Now I knew the truth. There were no more shadows of doubt. No more warring factions within my heart and my head. Now I knew the truth. And it felt good. Amidst the overwhelming sense of bewilderment and betrayal there was this undeniable peace. Where I expected bitterness and rage, there was acknowledgment and acceptance. There was no thirst for blood, no quest for vengeance. Yes I was devastated, hurt, angry, confused and sad. But the sensation that transcended all of those things was peace. A peace that passed human understanding. There was something else that began to rise up in me as well…a greater resolve to see this through and to not allow the devil to have victory. I will continue to fight even harder now, of this I am certain. I don’t understand what God is doing, but I need to trust that He is still for me, and He is still for my son. I refuse to throw in the towel. It’s not over yet.

But it still hurts…a lot. In fact, I feel the most ache for what my friends and family have endured because of these lies. We’ve been though so much together, an emotional and spiritual rollercoaster. It seems like it was all for nothing. The sleepless nights, the anxiety, the tears of despair, the many fervent prayers going up for situations that weren’t even happening…thinking that Wilber was legally my son, when in fact we’re still in process. Hope and despair, heartache and celebrations. Up and down. All I can say is that I’m so incredibly sorry that you were caught in the middle of this, and that these lies have potentially caused great distraction for you throughout the past year. I was communicating what I thought to be the truth. I always knew deep down that I could not walk this road alone, and so I asked for help. And so many of you have been so kind and generous to me, your financial assistance, your kind words, your many prayers. I can’t being to tell you what they have meant to me and to my son. I never want to take them for granted or minimize their effectiveness. Please don’t give up on me. Don’t give up on Wilber. He deserves better. He deserves to be home. We can’t give up. We won’t give up.

So where is the case now, you may ask? Well, it’s been moving slowly along the whole time. And while Esteban didn’t do anything to help the case, he didn’t really do anything to hurt it either. He never had contact with any judges or lawyers or government officials. He just fed me the lies and took my money. The process is nowhere near where we thought it was, but it’s still moving.

From the very beginning there were always two issues to work through: 1. the birth mother’s name was written incorrectly on Will’s birth certificate, and 2. The birth father was never issued a proper birth certificate. Then first issue went to trial and was resolved this past January. The second issue is at trial right now. The initial judge was going to resolve it months ago, but it moved to another judge who is taking his time with this because it’s the first time he’s come across this scenario. Nubia, my lawyer, told me that she hopes this trial is resolved within June. If that happens, then we can finally move to the Ministry of the Family, (for the first time), and have both Wilber and the birth mom sign. Then it needs to move to the adoption council, which meets randomly whenever they can. Nubia says that could be in August or September. Following that council, if everything is approved, we go to the final court where the judge makes the final decision. Following a successful final court, Wilber can finally get his new documents with his new name, and then we can finally get things moving with Canadian immigration.

So now we have actual things to pray for. Please pray that these next steps could happen quickly, and that Will could be home before the next school year. I know that seems unlikely, but I pray for a miracle here. Will is living at the aunt’s house again, and while it is not ideal, it is the best option for now. Nubia told me that it won’t cause any problems with the process, as some of the new Nicaraguan laws are more relaxed now. The aunt is not the enemy, as Esteban tried to make her out to be. She actually was trying to warn me about him for awhile, but knew that it was easier for him to convince me than it was for her. She actually seems to care a great deal for Wilber. Please pray for continued safety for him.

So that’s it for now. I’m sure you must have a zillion questions, and hopefully I’ll be able to address all of them in time. The one thing I will say is this: no matter how deeply Esteban has hurt me and my family and friends with his actions, now is not the time for bitterness, hate, and revenge. I will not and cannot excuse Esteban’s actions, but we must guard our hearts from the desire to bring our own brand of justice. The devil has destroyed too much already, and we must not allow him to get the upper hand by creating a spirit of hatred within us. Now is the time to draw on God’s power and grace. We must believe that God will deal with Esteban in his own way and in His own time, and we must not be consumed by thoughts of retribution. Peace and grace must prevail. My son deserves the best of us now, not the worst. He deserves our unyielding prayers and support. He deserves to feel the grace and peace of God, and that is what I want to administer to him. So let’s rally around him with the full armour of God, ready to protect and defend. Now we know the truth, the truth has set us free. Let’s now declare that freedom and that victory over my son and over this process.

Are you still with me?

More Prayer Needed

2009-06-01T12:35:00.002-06:00

Well, yesterday was supposed to bring some answers, but it has instead brought a thousand more questions. Turns out that no one met me at the airport, and I had to find my way to Veracruz in a taxi. I have been trying to locate Esteban, but have not been successful. All my leads are turning up empty. Even his brother doesn't know where he is. I'm getting a little nervous...I'm so confused as to what has happened and why Esteban never met me. Did he get the date wrong or something? I just spoke with him on Saturday, so that thought seems unlikely. I am now somewhat stranded here, relying on my limited Spanish to get me through, and unable to contact my son. This is not fun. I was supposed to have the documents in my hands last night, and instead I have a rock in my gut as I try and make sense of what is happening.

Please pray for me. I feel alone right now and I really need to find out where Esteban is and what has happened. Pray for clarity, and that I can make good decisions as I try and figure all this out.

thanks for the prayers,

Corwin

Battle to the End

2009-05-30T23:18:00.000-06:00

Hi everyone,

I am on my way to Nicaragua within the next few hours, and I need to share some very important details with you.

Firstly, thanks to everyone who supported the steak night last week. I was humbled by the outpouring of support. Thanks especially to the committee for all their hard work, and for initiating the idea in the first place. It was a another reminder that I do not walk this journey alone. Thank you.

Secondly, I am asking you for your prayers again. It has been a crazy month, with a ton of allegations going back and forth between all the Nicaraguans involved in this process: Esteban, my son, my lawyer, and Will's family. Everyone seems to have a different story as to what has actually transpired over the past three months since I returned from Project Serve. It has been so difficult trying to make sense of everything, trying to discern who is lying, who is telling the truth, or if in fact everyone is lying to me.

I have been trying to hold on to the hope that Esteban has been the most truthful with me, though there are many things I will need to get clarification about. One thing that I do know is that Will has been living back with his aunt in the ghetto for the past little while...how long exactly is still a mystery. But it seems when Will is at his aunt's house, things do not go well. I know that Will's aunt and grandma are trying to use Will to gain leverage over the situation, with the intent of financial gain. This seems to be the theme within most of my Nicaraguan relationships...everyone wants a piece of what they think I have.

Esteban told me this morning that he has all the documents except for the passport, which we will get and I will sign for on Monday. He said that he is excited to get the documents into my hands tomorrow night and to prove once and for all that he has been doing all the work he has claimed to have done. He also told me that Will's aunt is trying to get a lawyer to bring some kind of legal action against me. In an attempt to get money out of me, I have been told that she is trying to make an allegation that I am not really Will's dad, but just a friend who is sponsoring him. I am not sure if she is trying to put the immigration process at risk or what her exact intentions are, but I'm sure that it has something to do with money. Apparently, Will's aunt along with three others are planning to be there at the airport when I arrive so they can make their move. But Esteban also told me not to worry, since the adoption is final and we have all the final documents, there is nothing they can do. I still wonder what they are planning, and how they are planning to manipulate my son against me.

So it seems like I am going into battle. I have no idea what to expect when I get off the plane tomorrow at 8:00pm. I don't know who will be waiting for me. Are the documents actually ready? Will I have them in my hands by the end of the day? What kind of attack is Will's aunt planning? Will I finally get the answers I have been searching for? Will the truth be finally revealed?

Please pray! I've had enough and I'm in a scrapping mood. I'm sick of the games. I'm tired of the lies. I'm done with that. Time to end this. Time to claim victory. Walk with me into this battle please. Pray that I will feel all of God's power and strength rise up as I fight for my son.

Are you with me? Let's do this!

2 Timothy 1:7
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline"

An opportunity to help...

2009-05-04T23:22:00.004-06:00

Hi everyone, this is Kristin here. I asked Corwin if I could post an important announcement about an opportunity for us to help bring Will home. Some friends of Corwin's are hosting a Steak Night Fundraiser to help cover some of the ongoing adoption costs, and if you're from Saskatoon or area we'd love to see you there!

Here's all the info:

Bring Him Home Steak Night
Wednesday, May 20th
at the Odeon Events Center in Saskatoon
6:00pm - 9:00pm
Tickets are $20 each (special kids meals available for $5)

The event will include some great food, a 50/50 draw, a silent auction, and some great live music. It'll be an awesome night, and a great time to get updated on the adoption and support Corwin and Will.

For tickets or information please contact Kimberly at kim.jesse@gmail.com or at 651-0807.

We hope to see you there!!

How Long Lord?

2009-04-28T01:01:00.001-06:00

Ok, go ahead…say it…I’m horrible at updates. This I know to be true. It has been so difficult knowing what to say and how to say it. But you are my family, you are my lifeline, so I will try and bring you up to speed on all that has happened over the last month.

UPS lost the documents. I waited and waited, made phone call after phone call to no avail. UPS in Nicaragua claims the docs were delivered 3 weeks ago, but to where and to whom remains the big mystery. I really think the UPS in Managua is lying about the whole thing, and they are taking no responsibility for any of this. This has been a nightmare for me, an unimaginable turn of events. I’ve asked a lot of questions and cried a lot of tears…answers are not coming. But the fight must continue, and so I press on…knowing in the depths of my soul that God has this whole thing in his hands…I must cling to this hope, for when my faith is shattered and showing no signs of life, it is all I have left. It’s been a difficult few weeks.

I was in California the past 2 weeks. I was honored to be the speaker for YFC’s annual California Breakaway…160 high school kids from Saskatchewan in Cali for 10 days. It was bittersweet, as the plan was for Will to be with us this year. I couldn’t help but think of all that he would be experiencing and processing. I guess we’ll plan for next year. While in LA, I authorized Esteban to begin the process of getting new documents to replace the ones that UPS lost. He assured me that this process would not take long. But as it seems to be with this story, we hit a speed bump immediately; we needed to get Will’s birth mom to resign the custody documents. Unbelievable! The thought of this made me incredibly nervous, as most of January was spent dealing with this woman, trying to find her, getting her to sign, etc. It had been a lot of intense drama, and I honestly did not want to go through all of that again. Thankfully, we didn’t have to. Esteban found her in one day, and got to her to sign the docs immediately. What a relief…a little less drama than last time!

Esteban told me that everything would be ready by the Friday after Calbreak, so after the group of students returned to Saskatchewan, I stuck around in Cali for a few days. My plan was to buy a ticket to fly from LA to Managua…it would be less expensive than flying form home. My plan was to get the docs and personally bring them home. I don’t trust any courier service from Nicaragua at this point. My son’s future with his dad and his new family is my priority and passion, and I will continue to sacrifice everything to bring Will home. So, I booked a flight for last Monday, thinking that everything would be ready by the end of the week. 5 hours before my flight, Esteban e-mailed me to tell me that replacing Will’s birth certificate might take up to 3 weeks. This was so discouraging. I couldn’t afford to spend 3 weeks in Managua waiting for this document. So I had to cancel my flight and prepare to fly home to wait it out in Saskatoon. I could still use my travel credit with Continental when the docs are finally ready, so that soften the blow a little bit. But this was still very disheartening. Will was incredibly disappointed as well. This has been really hard on him as well.

Then another hit…the following evening I received an email from my lawyer. She told me that Will’s birth certificate was ready! Wow, it took only one day and not three weeks as was predicted. But there was a big problem…they were not going to release it. In getting the replacement docs together, the government had discovered a discrepancy. Last year, I spent $1000 to fix the birth certificate of Will’s birth father so it would match his death certificate. Everything was finally fixed and done. However, the government, for some reason, kept the incorrect birth certificate of Will’s birth dad on file. Now there were two different certificates…one that would indicate that this man is dead, the other would mean this man is still alive. Now the government was going to investigate my lawyer, to ensure that she hadn’t fabricated the new certificate…she could face jail time…the process could come to a screeching halt.

As I read my lawyer’s words my heart sank, and I just broke down emotionally and spiritually. I was still in California, and even though I was among friends, I felt so utterly alone in that moment. I felt like everything was unraveling…everything we fought so hard to accomplish was being undone. It felt like a dark cloud had covered me. Hope was fading. In my moment of desperation, I didn’t know what to do. I stumbled outside and found a quiet and secluded area, and under the dark Los Angeles night sky, I fell with my face to the ground. I wept bitterly and beat my fists into the grass. The burden was too heavy. I screamed at God, asking why He chose me to walk through this, why the roadblocks kept coming…we were so close…it had all been finished, and now it was all seeming to come apart. I was so broken, so frustrated, so done. But still, the flame of hope could not be extinguished, and even though it was barely bright enough to cast a shadow, it was still alive. In the midst of such heartache, God refused to let go. He’s still not providing many answers, but he is not letting go.

The next day Esteban explained more of the situation, and informed me that Will’s birth certificate wouldn’t be released until the investigation of my lawyer was complete. Everything had been done the proper legal way, so he told me not to worry. However, I was told that the investigation could take up to a month. This was so hard to hear. But in Nicaragua, there is always an expedited rate…you know how it works: For $400 US, I was told that the government official doing the investigation was willing to move our case to the top of the pile and have everything done in a week. What could I do? I had no choice really…I desperately want my son home, and if it meant another financial hit, then so be it. So I sent the money, and returned home to Saskatoon the following day. I got home last Friday night.

I received another e-mail from Esteban last night. He said that there was good news: today he was going to take Will’s aunt and grandma to court (again), and have them sign another document that would officially render the incorrect birth certificate null and void. This would allow Will’s birth certificate to finally be released, which in turn would allow us to get a new passport for him. Esteban assured me that everything would be ready by the end of the week, but that in order for this to happen, everyone needed their cut…my lawyer wanted another $150, each of Will’s relatives wanted money for missing work, money was needed for a car rental…it never ends. So I sent another $500 US down this morning, and I have waited all day to hear how everything went. I have not received any news, but I am hopeful that everything that needed to happen, happened, and that the docs will be ready by the end of the week. If they are, my plan is use my Continental credit to help get me down there to pick up the docs myself. I know it doesn’t seem rational, but I just don’t trust anyone down there right now. If there was to be another problem with sending the docs to Canada, if there was another delay or if the docs were lost again, I would complete lose it! It would create another unimaginable scenario…and I am so done with that. I need to take hold of this and fight for my son in any way I can. So it may seem irrational, but flying down will allow me to personally take these docs home, and give me a few days with my son as well. I have not seen him since Feb 24, and I miss him desperately.

So that’s the update, that’s the ongoing drama of this story. Thanks for sticking with me. Thanks for your ongoing prayers and support. I desperately need them now to help Will and I reach the finish line!

God bless,

Corwin

Waiting For The Docs

2009-03-26T16:58:00.002-06:00

Esteban has told me that he shipped the documents with UPS last Saturday, and that the scheduled arrival time was today at 4:00pm. Well, it's 5:00pm now and still no word. The tracking number he gave me doesn't work, so it's hard not to get a little nervous. But I am trying to remain calm and stay positive. I've been working from home today in the event that the docs do arrive today...they are coming here and not to any UPS store. So I wait...

In other news, many of Will's friends are starting high school in Matagalpa tomorrow, and he e-mailed me today saying that he really wants to go too. He has been out of normal school for over a year, so I don't know if they will take him or not. I'm actually surprised, as Will hasn't had the best attitude when it comes to school. But it might be a good idea, as it will keep him busy and potentially prepare him for returning to formal education once he comes to Canada. It will also distract him from the thoughts of returning to his aunt's house in the Managua ghetto. I need to find out more info about what is involved in enrolling him, and whether it is worthwhile knowing that I will hopefully be pulling him out to bring him home really soon.

that's the update for now. I'm praying these docs arrive really soon!

Corwin

Documents En Route

2009-03-23T22:52:00.004-06:00

Well friends, after a very lengthy back and forth process, Esteban apparently received ALL the final documents, including Will's passport and birth certificate, last Friday. It took another $620 US for the Nicaraguan government to finally release them...what else is new?! Anyway, Esteban told me that he couriered the docs to me on Saturday and that they would be in my hands in 2 days. I have not been able to get in touch with him since then, so I do not know what courier he used, the tracking number, etc...I have been doing what I seem to be always doing...waiting. Waiting to hear from Esteban, waiting to receive an e-mail with the scanned docs, waiting for any news that the docs are safe and actually on their way to me. I hate it. I hate the waiting. I hate the desperate nature of it. I hate the fact that I cannot control it. I'm done with waiting, I really am. But alas, I have no choice. It's beginning to take it's toll on me... I assume that you all are tired of waiting as well, I don't blame you if you've reached the point where you've kinda checked out on this story...it has been excruciating at times.

But please, if you are still following this story, if you still pray for this process, I still appreciate your prayers...I need them, to be perfectly honest...

Please pray that the documents will arrive safely in Saskatoon by tomorrow or Wednesday, and that I can have the docs translated and certified by the end of the week. My son is trying to be patient as well...we need to get these docs to the Embassy by next week. Please pray with me that this can be accomplished, and that I will be able to pull together the resources I need to finish off this process, and that when the time comes, I will have the resources to fly down to bring Will home!

thanks again for all your prayers and support. God is good, He is faithful and true.

Corwin

Not Home Yet

2009-03-14T22:23:00.003-06:00

I wish that the title of this post could be different, and I could be writing you today with the good news that Will is finally home. The fight still continues. There's a light at the end of the tunnel, but some days it doesn't feel like it's getting any closer.

This is Kristin again, bringing you an update on what seems to be a never ending battle to get this kid home! A lot has gone on, and I'm confident that this fight is almost over. Where to begin...

First of all, I want to thank you for praying for Will. I'm very happy to report that he's doing very well. The past year hasn't always been easy for him. He's been on his own personal roller coaster of emotion as he's been processing through this adoption in his own way. But God is good, and he's brought Will peace and happiness in his current home in Matagalpa. He's been living with Esteban and his wife for the past few months. Matagalpa is a couple hours away from where Will grew up. It was an unfamiliar community to him, and at first his transition was tough. But he settled in quite quickly, and has made some really good friends. He's gotten involved in the local church and youth group, and has regained a passion for God. Corwin was down in Nicaragua in February with the Project Serve team, and he was thrilled to see Will doing so well. Being away from his son is incredibly difficult for Corwin, but seeing Will thriving in his new surroundings did his heart good. Even though he feels happy and settled, Will is still incredibly excited to come to Canada. He knows that his home is here, and he's just as anxious as the rest of us to start this chapter of his life. But praise God that while he's there, he's happy and well taken care of. Thank God for Esteban and his wife for opening up their home and being Will's temporary family. Knowing that Will is safe and happy has brought Corwin the peace of mind he needs to complete this journey.

At this point the adoption process seems never ending. As you know, the courts finalized the adoption and legally declared Corwin to be Will's dad at the end of January, but there has been some final details and paperwork to be done. From our perspective this paperwork should have taken a few days, but once again it seems that the Nicaraguan government has a different time line. It's now been close to 6 weeks, and still the paperwork is almost done. Last week Corwin was thrilled to hear that Esteban had met with the lawyer one last time to collect the final documents. The process was finally finished, and Esteban had Will's new passport and birth certificate in his hands. Just when we all thought it was finished, Esteban got a call on Monday morning saying that the lawyer needed the documents back. Corwin is constantly assured that nothing is wrong with the adoption itself. Everything has met the final approval of the courts, but once again the documents need to be checked over. There's always one more signature needed, or one more judge who needs to approve the process. As it sits right now, Esteban has been told that the documents should be ready on Monday. Please join is in praying that Nuvia can produce these papers on Monday, and Esteban can get them in the mail to Canada. Once Corwin receives them he needs to go through the immigration process, and as you can imagine he is MORE than ready to get that started. Corwin has done a lot of research about the immigration process, and it seems to be very straight forward and fairly quick. Once the papers reach the embassy in Guatamala, it should take anywhere from 2 days to 2 weeks. At this point, that seems like a drop in the bucket. But please begin to pray that this case will breeze through immigration in record time, and that Will can be home in the next few weeks. Corwin and Will are a family, and it doesn't seem fair that they can't be together. Will had to live the first 14 years of his life without a dad, and every day that goes by is another undeserved day without a real family. Let's pray this kid home!

Even though this process has at times been frustrating and seems never ending, it's still so obvious that God is at the center of it all. Corwin's lawyer Nuvia is still amazed as she watches judge after judge approve this process. She, more than anyone, would understand how unprecedented this whole adoption has been. They have never before allowed a single man to adopt, yet day after day God shows up and orchestrates this adoption as only He can. Nuvia does not have a personal relationship with God, but she cannot deny that He is ultimately responsible for making this happen. Praise God that He has used this adoption to reveal Himself to others. Even when the end seems out of reach, it's undeniable that God is faithful and He will see this process through to the end. He was the one who asked Corwin to step out in faith, and He has kept His promises again and again. The days are ticking by, but I remain confident that the day will soon come when Corwin can go and get his son.

I'll leave you with one last prayer request. Corwin has been fairly candid about the financial strain of this adoption. It has been not only emotionally draining for him, but financially draining as well. First and foremost it's important for me to say that Corwin is beyond grateful for all of the support he's received, in every area of this adoption. He feels your love and support, and could not have done this without you. I know that he struggles to find the right words to show his appreciation, because thank you just doesn't seem like enough. I know that he longs to be able to provide the finances needed to see this thing through, but the reality is that he needs our help. It's incredibly hard for him to keep asking for help, as he's so humbled by the unwavering support that he's already received. So I am here to ask for him. Just to give you a window into what this adoption is costing him, Corwin has sent $1000 down to Nicaragua in the last week alone. There are countless ongoing legal fees and living expenses that he is responsible for providing. He has made a lot of personal sacrifice, but he just can't personally provide for all of these financial responsibilities. Especially when he is facing the fast approaching reality of purchasing 2 plane tickets to get his son home. If you are able to help, or can pass on this information to anyone who might be interested in contributing I know that Corwin would be incredibly grateful. Once again, to make a donation just follow the paypal link found on this blog.

We are getting close, friends. Please don't underestimate the role that you play in this process. God is listening to our prayers, and He will be faithful to being Wilber home. I can't thank you enough for all that you've done for Corwin and Will.

God bless,

Kristin Clark

Project Serve

2009-02-16T08:09:00.003-06:00

I am back in Nicaragua with my son, this time with the Project Serve Team. Please follow our journey by visiting the PS09 OFFICIAL BLOG.

On the adoption front, it doesn't look like my son will be able to travel with the team back to Canada. Please pray that the official documents and Will's passport will be ready by the end of this week.

Thanks,

Corwin

WILBER DANIEL THIESSEN!!!!

2009-01-26T16:22:00.002-06:00

Praise Jesus! We did it! At approximately 3:57pm, on Monday January 26, 2009, Will's birth mom signed the final documents, and I officially and legally became a father! I can't express the joy in my heart right now, it is actually quite surreal. I cannot express my sincere gratitude for all of your thoughts, notes of encouragement, financial gifts and most importantly your unceasing prayer! I am so humbled and overwhelmed by the support I have received, you have all been part of this journey, and while there is still the Canadian Immigration hurdle to overcome, the end has never seemed so near, and you were a huge part of this last victory. There a few more victories yet to celebrate, but God continues to show his faithfulness, even amidst the most impossible of circumstances.

Don't know what else to say, I'm still shaking... It's not quite over yet, but he's almost home.
Stay tuned

Thank You!

God Bless You!

Corwin and Wilber Thiessen

Court has been moved to 1:30pm

2009-01-26T09:52:00.001-06:00

Ahhh, they always do this! Court in a few hours. Thanks for praying!

The Fight Continues

2009-01-22T22:03:00.021-06:00

The heartache and hope continues, although yesterday seemed to bring a little too much heartache and not enough hope. This is Kristin Clark, a friend and co worker of Corwin's. This has been a really eventful week, full of emotional ups and downs. I asked Corwin if I could have the important job of filling all of you in on the recent events, and present a unique opportunity to join us in prayer.

Yesterday was another opportunity for final court, where Will's birth mother had the chance to appear before the judge and relinquish all of her legal rights as Will's mother. In theory, there was nothing standing in the way. Esteban (Will's current care giver) located the mother on Monday and stayed with her in a hostile for a couple of days leading up to the court date. The time came to appear in court, and she was willing to show up and sign the documents. What Esteban didn't know was that there was a committee present in the court room, and in addition to the mother's signature they also required a verbal confession that she is in fact Will's birth mom. She is heavily addicted to drugs, and even with a couple of days to straighten out before court she was still unsure of where she was and what was going on. When asked if she is in fact Will's mother, she answered "I don't know, I don't remember". What a heartbreaking statement on so many different levels.

So, what now? Well, God has shown favor by providing a very sympathetic, Christian judge who is willing to try again. There is another court time set for Monday in hopes that the mother can clear her mind and start to gain some memory back. Right now the mother is under 24 hour surveillance, and is willing to reappear in court on Monday ... but there are some road blocks. It's possible that the mother is suffering from some kind of permanent brain injury or memory loss, and she won't be any more coherent by Monday. It's also possible that Monday will be the last chance for final court, and the judge will either postpone this case for several months or dismiss is all together. These thoughts are far too terrifying for Corwin to even contemplate, so please join us in holding onto hope and believing that God will bring victory.

Corwin was very close to getting on a plane today and going down to Nicaragua to fight for his son. Although it could be hard to go down there and fight this fight in person, I know that it is much harder for Corwin to stay here and struggle with feelings of helplessness. The last couple of weeks have been filled with very long days as Corwin sits and waits for word from Nicaragua, but he's been asked by his lawyer and Esteban to remain in Canada. There are a lot of complications that have surfaced in dealing with Will's family, far surpassing this current situation with his mom. These complications become even more difficult when Corwin is down in Nicaragua, and so for now the best thing he can do for his son and this adoption is to stay here. As hard as that is for him, that's reality right now.

I've been watching Corwin walk this journey for a long time now. I've seen the overwhelming support that he's received, not just from his friends and family but from people he doesn't even know. Thank you so much for all of the support and prayer you have generously given. One day soon I believe that you'll read a post about Will's homecoming, knowing that you've played a part in this story. But the fight is not over, and I am in desperate need of your help. This story has been bathed in prayer from the beginning, but if there was ever a time to pray, the time is now. Will deserves to be welcomed into a family that loves him. He deserves to know the true and unconditional love of a father. He deserves to leave all the tragedies of his upbringing behind him. His family and community are here, and as his community we need to give Will all of the support that we can. We have set in place a prayer vigil that will be running 24 hours a day from Friday morning until final court on Monday. It's broken up into half hour shifts, and we would be beyond grateful to have every spot filled.

Here's a quick summery of some prayer requests:

-For Will's birth mother, Bertha. We need to pray that she stays put over the weekend, and this would be the time she needs to gain some clarity of mind. There is obviously a chance that she will become agitated and angry as she gets further into the detox process. Pray that she can remain calm and begin to understand what she needs to contribute to complete this adoption.

-Pray for Esteban (Will's caregiver). He has been working tirelessly, and the last 2 weeks have taken a toll on him. He feels alone and frustrated, and wants nothing more then for Will to be able to come home. Pray for strength and perseverance for him, that he can feel our support from here.

-Pray for Will. This process is also becoming very hard for him. He wants so badly to move here and begin his new life. He was rejected once by his birth mom, and I can't imagine what it's been like for him to be rejected again. Pray that his heart can heal, and that he can be home with his dad very soon.

-Pray for Corwin. These have been some dark days, and he sometimes struggles to hold onto the hope that his son will soon be home. It's incredibly hard for him to be in Canada right now, so far away from Will. He's weary, and often feels like he doesn't have much fight left in him. Pray that he can be filled with the strength and courage he needs to see this through.

-Pray for court on Monday. Pray that Bertha will do and say what is required to finalize the adoption. Pray that the judge will continue to be sympathetic and understanding when dealing with her, and that the committee will be satisfied with the answers she gives.

If you are willing to take a half hour time slot, please send me an email at bringhimhome@live.ca with the time you'd like. Even if you can't commit to a certain time, please remember these requests and bring them before God as you think of them this weekend.

A lot of Friday is already filled, so I'll start this post with Saturday. It will only take a 151 people praying once for half an hour to keep Corwin, Will and everyone else covered between now and Monday night. I'll update this post as the spots get filled, so feel free to check back.

May God richly bless you for your continued support.

On behalf of Corwin,
Kristin Clark

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Still Searching...

2009-01-16T10:34:00.003-06:00

Court is in 1 1/2 hours, and we still haven't found her. Please start ampin' up those prayers! We need a miracle here.

Corwin

The Search Begins Again

2009-01-14T23:52:00.002-06:00

Early Thursday morning, Esteban and Wilber will make the trek back to Managua to find the birth mom once more. Keep on praying for this...Friday is the new day.

Hope is Rising!

Corwin

Heartache and Hope

2009-01-12T21:15:00.003-06:00

This journey keeps on being filled with a mixture of heartache and hope. Yesterday’s events were no different:

Yesterday Esteban and Will went to the market to pick up Will’s mom, and she wasn’t there. They searched for about an hour, and eventually went to the court without her. The judge was sympathetic, and allowed them to go back to the market and resume their search. After an additional 2 hours of searching, after scouring the entire market and making hundreds of inquiries, ultimately their quest was fruitless. Esteban told me that Wilber was so angry and distraught that he began to cry. Monday was to be the day that Will legally would become a Thiessen, and today was to be the day that he finally got his passport. All this was slipping away…I can imagine how frustrating it must have been for them.

They returned to the court and explained the situation to the judge. This is the part of the story where hope begins to rise up.

Turns out that God paved the way for a Christian judge to be assigned to us! He is a member of a local Baptist church in Managua, which is the same denomination that I have served throughout the past 12 years. Esteban explained all the work that I had done in Veracruz, and even promised the judge that my forthcoming team would visit his church in February and play with the kids. The judge was very impressed by my track record and all the documents in the adoption dossier. He told Esteban and Will that he has no objection to the adoption, and once we have the birth mom’s signature, he will be more than happy the make it final! This is amazing news! Now we have the assurance that this WILL happen…no doubt about it…this adoption will be completed. I already had custody, but now I know that I will be granted full parental rights and Will’s name will legally become Wilber Daniel Thiessen. I know now that the Nicaraguan courts will allow me to take Wilber to Canada. This is the answer the countless prayers. But in order for this final consummation, we still need the signature of Will’s birth mom.

The judge has granted another opportunity this coming Friday, January 16th. He said that he has 5 other cases, but if they can get her court, he will make it happen…no questions, no long drawn out procedures…5 minutes to get her signature, and that’ll be the end of it. What this means is that Esteban and Will need to get back to Managua on Thursday, find the mom again, and then try and get her to court the following day. Please continue to pray for this. It took them a few days to find her last week, so this may prove to be a daunting task once more. And pray that somehow they will be able to get her to court on Friday.

Again, I’ll be honest with you and tell you that while this new opportunity to get the mom’s signature is very exciting, it will also be costly. I’ll need to pull together another $1000 to get the crew back to Managua for Thursday and to then keep them there until they can get the passport on the following Monday…it never seems to ends. I don’t really enjoy always talking about the financial struggles, and I don’t want people to feel sorry for me, but I’ve tried to be honest with you along this journey, and this the reality that I am faced with. It can be a scary reality at times, but I have a ‘star breathing’ God who refuses to let me go. I need to refuse to give up…I need maintain the determination to go the distance. Thanks again for your constant support and prayers, and for listening to my grumblings. I will never have the words to adequately express my gratitude for all you’ve done.

Friday is the new day. May hope continue to rise up.

God bless you,

Corwin

They Found Her!!

2009-01-11T18:49:00.004-06:00

Just found out that they found Will's birth mom! Praise Jesus! However, she didn't want to go to the Provadenic with them for the night, nor did she accept an invitation to join them for dinner...I'm guessing it would be really awkward for her with Wilber there...but she agreed to come to final court and sign the final documents. They will pick her up in the morning before final court. Let's pray she's in a good state of mind.

14 hours to go...keep praying!!

Corwin

Final Court Is 3 Days Away!!!

2009-01-08T22:31:00.003-06:00

Well, it’s been almost a month since my last post, as there has been nothing going on but the daily realization that waiting has become my new reality. I hate it. Not very interesting to read about. But I guess maybe you too have been waiting…waiting for any news, any little nugget of new information…well, here it is:

The final court date, which was set for December, then January 2nd, and then January 13th, has now been set for Monday January 12th, 2009 at 9:00am. That is this coming Monday!! This is it…the final court…what all the waiting has been leading towards. I’m almost unable to define how I feel about it. It’s been such a long time coming. Of course I’m extremely excited and nervous, but there’s a part of me that wonders what the next setback will be. I know, I know, have faith Corwin…and I do, it’s just that this whole experience continues to be very surreal, and it is almost impossible for me to imagine it being over. But it will. I know it will.

At the final court, if everything goes as planned, the judge will finally award Will’s new birth certificate to me with his new name: Wilber Daniel Thiessen. With this certificate, we are able to get Will’s passport, which will allow us to submit his immigration papers to the Consulate, which will finally allow me to bring him home. Right now I am wondering if it will be possible to bring him home with the Project Serve team that I bring down in February…not exactly the poignant homecoming that I have imagined throughout the past year and a half, but I’ll take it. So we are praying that this final court will indeed be the final court.

As I write this, Esteban and Wilber are in Managua, and in the next few days they will be trying to find Wills’ birth mother, as she will also need to come to final court. This has proven to be challenging in the past, so please pray that they will find her. The other challenge is to make sure she is in a right state of mind…she is a known drug user, and if she comes to court high as a kite, the judge will not allow her to sign the final document that she needs to sign…which means another postponement of final court. The plan right now is to find her and take her to the Provadenic, where she will stay for a day or two as they try to sober her up. This will be extremely awkward for Wilber, so pray that he will be able to deal with it ok. Esteban’s wife Sandra is joining them, so hopefully that will take some of the pressure off the guys as they deal with Will’s mom. Pray that she will come to court in a right state of mind, and that she will sign the final documents.

I’m not sure if Wilber’s aunt or grandma will find out about the final court, or if they will show up and try to sabotage things, so you can pray that they will stay away. And pray that my lawyer will be ready to go for Monday.

In preparation of this monumental day in my history, I am planning on taking time to pray and fast on Saturday and Sunday. I am inviting anyone who feels led, to join me in this, whether it’s praying or fasting or both. I covet your continued participation in this journey, especially now as we are getting so close. Thank you again for your support and prayers, they are the reason we are where we are.

I would also ask you to pray for the financial challenges that I am facing. In autumn I received many generous and thoughtful financial gifts, and I was so humbled and thankful. It left me speechless. Those donations allowed me to travel to Nicaragua in November to get the Martinez family crisis under control and to get Wilber set up in a safe place while we awaited final court. He has been enjoying Mataglapa and making many new friends. He seems happy there. I am so thankful that he has been in a good, safe place these past 2 months, far from the ghetto, and far from his toxic aunt and grandmother. He has been surrounded by loving people from Esteban's church, and I'm so glad.

But the waiting has been so difficult, on every level. The reality is that I was really expecting my son to be home before Christmas. Every month that he remains in Nicaragua continues to drain my resources. I can’t keep this up much longer, and I am anxious about the added legal fees that might be around the corner. My line of credit is maxed out, and now I am forced to use my credit card to pay for all these expenses. Just this morning I had to send $1200 down to Nicaragua to pay for all the expenses related to this final court, including the car rental, and room and board for Esteban, his wife, Wilber, and Wilber’s birth mom. The exchange rate is really killing me these days. I know that I will ride out this financial storm, but sometimes I get scared. This process has cost me so much more than I ever expected. Even with all the generous donations, I am still in an extremely tight spot right now. I just need this process to be over…and when it is over, I want to have enough reserve so that I can give Wilber a good start when he finally comes home.

Sorry, that’s just being honest with how I’m feeling. You can pray for my peace of mind as well!

So there it is, a lot to pray for hey? Well, we’ve come this far, let’s finish it off. Are ya with me?

Peace and Hope...

Corwin

Praying For The Court Date

2008-12-11T19:36:00.002-06:00

Sorry I haven't updated sooner...it's hard to report when things are at a standstill. Well, I heard finally heard from Nicaragua today regarding the final court date...it seems that the Nicaraguan government has canceled all courts for December. It is so discouraging. So now we are hoping that Jan 2 is going to be our final court date, but that will be decided tomorrow. My lawyer wants to meet with Will tomorrow and go over the final questions that he will be asked at the final court. They will also be assigning the final court date for us. We are praying for Jan 2, since the next 2 dates, from what I understand, are the 2nd week and the 3rd week of January. We really need the Jan 2 date, so we can get moving on the passport and immigration piece.

PLEASE PRAY!!! Pray that we will be assigned the Jan 2 court date.

I was really hoping to have Wilber home for Christmas, but that's not gonna happen. It is going to be so difficult to spend Christmas so far away from my son. I don't have the resources to travel back for Christmas or New Year's...and even if I did, I don't know if it would be a good use of those resources. Still, the thought of being separated from my son is taking its toll emotionally. Pray that God would provide the strength for both Will and I to make it through this season. Will keeps asking when I will be able to return to Nicaragua again. It breaks my heart.

But for now, as far as I understand, Will is safe in Matagalpa with Esteban, and he is learning to adapt to life far away from his hometown and his friends. Please pray for his safety, and that he will make some significant and positive friends while waiting for this to all be over.

I'll try and update once we know the final date.

Corwin

Emergency Prayer Request

2008-11-23T14:36:00.002-06:00

Hey everyone, I just learned that THIS COMING MONDAY, Nov 24, the Nicaraguan government will be selecting only 10 adoption cases for the next final court. The court date will happen the first week of December. This court only meets every two months, so it is so crucial that our case is selected as one of the 10.

PLEASE PRAY, that the Ministerio de la Familia will select our case for the next final court, and that Wilber can be home by Christmas. I need your intercession!

Thanks again,

Corwin

Exciting News

2008-11-20T20:19:00.003-06:00

Hey everyone,

Well, I'm back in Canada again. Sometimes I feel like a yo-yo. I have actually been home for a few weeks already. After 8 days in Managua, I was able to find out some more info about the passport process. I was of the understanding that I needed to physically be there in Nicaragua in order for Will to get his passport. Well, we discovered that my lawyer can sign the documents needed for his passport. I don't need to physically be there. This new development has allowed me to return to Canada to wait out the rest of the process. Will is safe and happy in Matagalpa right now, so that has been a huge weight off my shoulders. We are keeping him away from some of the family members who are trying to use Will for their own selfish means, and to get money out of me. Keeping him away from his aunt is also beneficial for the legal process. I am so thankful that I was able to be in Nicaragua for those 8 days, it allowed me to get some important documents sorted out, some medical exam discrepancies resolved, and allowed me to finally find a safe and beneficial housing alternative for Will.

Thanks to all those who gave generously to the Bring Him Home Fund, it allowed for this last trip to happen!

The decision to come back early was not an easy one, but it was necessary. The primary concern was Will's personal safety, and that the legal process would keep moving. With those two things secure, it was important to consider the other reality: the cost of living in Nicaragua with Will and Esteban was quite high. With daily food, car rental, accommodation, and translation fees, etc, I was spending upwards of $200 per day. This was simply not sustainable. I would rather use that money to finish up the legal process. I also need to take care of the obligations I have here at home. Will, my family and I felt at peace with the decision for me to wait out the rest of the process here at home.

As I said earlier, there have been some very generous donations, and I have been humbled and overwhelmed. We still have more to get through, and many more significant expenses are coming up fast, so please pray that I would be able to have the resources to finish this process! I am still needing another $2000 - $3000 to close this chapter.

And now for the exciting news...Esteban has told me that some important documents in Nicaragua are finally ready!! Tomorrow they are going to pick up the documents and bring them to the government offices. As well, I have been told that tomorrow they are going to set the final court date! After the final court, I will finally be able to get Will's passport, and finally be able to complete the Immigration piece. Please pray that we can set that final court date tomorrow, and that it will be set for early next week. We are praying to bring Will home before Christmas. We're almost there.

Pray pray pray!

To close, here is a current picture of me and my son. He's getting so big already. Time to get him here. God bless!

Corwin

Back Again...

2008-11-04T11:59:00.002-06:00

Well, I'm back in Nicaragua again...sometimes it feels like I never left. My return is thanks to the support of so many of my family and friends. I have received many generous donations and gifts over the past few weeks, and I am definitely humbled by the response. It is so reassuring to have that tangible reminder that I am not alone on this road! So thank you so very much. We'll keep fighting until my son's home.

Not much else to report really, but I will say that my son is out of the dangerous neighbourhood and is back safely with me. So that's a good thing. The 'being a good dad' learning curve remains steep, and will continue to be a reality until the day I die! But we're enjoying some good times together.

My lawyer has still not given me any time line as to when all the doc's will be ready. So we continue to wait. She doesn't think it's possible to have the final court date within the next 2 weeks, but I told her that we are praying for a miracle. Please pray that there could be a major breakthrough this week, so we can finish this process. There is a major civic election here next weekend, so everything is moving slowly. As well, the government here stops working after the first week of December, so time is running out. I appreciate your continued prayers.

I will report more as things arise.

Blessings,
Corwin

Needing Your Help...

2008-10-22T00:10:00.002-06:00

Well, it's officially come down to this...I was hoping I could avoid this lingering reality, but I need to face the facts. I have tried my best to finance this adoption on my own. I got a line of credit on my home in order to free up the money I would need for the adoption process, to complete the renovations needed for Will's arrival, and to make some investments to secure my family's future. Throughout the past year I was blessed with some kind and generous monetary gifts, and some greatly appreciated gift cards to help out with future needs. I am very thankful. But the cost of this whole process has gone beyond my initial expectations. I have had to support both my son and his primary care givers throughout the past year. There have been numerous and unexpected legal fees. And having to travel back to Nicaragua numerous times to care for my son has also taken it's financial toll. We are so close to completing this part of the journey...but we're not quite there yet.

The housing situation has fallen through for my son, and he has been forced to live with his aunt again. This is not ideal, as the neighbourhood is extremely dangerous, and living with his family could pose potential problems with the completion of the process. Both my son and the process are now at risk. I have no choice to but to return to Nicaragua. My son needs me at this time. I was hoping that the housing plan we had made was going to be the perfect solution...but alas...in Nicaragua things change so quickly. Trying to make the best decisions for my son from here is virtually impossible. There are so many unforeseen circumstances that throw the best laid plans into utter chaos. Life in Nicaragua is hard, and I am honestly not looking forward to having to spend an undefined amount of time there. But I'll need to continually sacrifice my time and resources to keep my son safe and this process on track. So it looks like I'll be returning to Central America before the month is over. I will stay until the adoption is complete and I can finally send the immigration and papers and his passport to the Canadian Embassy. I have no idea how long it will take for the Embassy to issue Will's Residency Visa. It could be days, it could be weeks. I would like to come home while we wait for the Visa to be issued. That would allow me to get everything in order for Will's arrival. Then I would need to take one more trip down to finally bring him home.

The reality is that I essentially have no more resources to purchase the airfare that I am needing. I need help. As I mentioned in my first sentence, I hoped it wouldn't come to this. But I need your help. I need around $5000 in order to complete this adoption. That would cover the airfare for me and my son as well as the cost of living in Nicaragua for the next month. This is my reality. It is so difficult for me to ask for financial help. Maybe it's a pride issue, I don't know. I tried to do it alone. But I can't do it anymore. I've reached the end of what I can do.

With that in mind, I have added a donation button to this blog. It is through PalPal, which has proven to be an incredibly safe and easy way to donate online. You could make a donation with a credit card or through an existing PalPal account. It should be noted that it is not possible for me to issue a tax receipt for donations made...it would simply be a gift. Please do not feel obligated or pressured to give. Many of you have been following this story for awhile, so I thought that I needed to be honest about what's going on, and what I need to complete this process. This post was very hard to write.

Thanks again for your support, your love, and your prayers. It has sustained me through some very dark days. He's almost home...

God bless you,

Corwin

Bouncing Back

2008-10-06T23:46:00.004-06:00

It's amazing how quickly things can change...On Friday I was struggling to see God in the midst of this latest roadblock. I knew He was there, but my laments to Him were long and intense. This story continues to unfold in ways I could never imagine. Donald Miller has said that every good story needs conflict. Well, then I guess this one should be a page turner, because there seems to be an unending amount of it.

The chapters of this story are still being written, and it is often with trembling hands that I slowly turn the page...there is a part of me, an ever present infectious part that is so scared at what will be revealed in the coming paragraphs. But there is another part of me, a more elusive part that remains convinced the next page will be filled with even more accounts of God's faithfulness. (I wish that part was more alive in me.) Just like the Israelites in the Old Testament, it is so easy for me to see these miracles, to behold the waters parting before my very eyes, and then 3 seconds later to find myself actually questioning God's presence in my life. Why do I doubt? When will I learn? I'm glad God is patient with me. I have been trying so hard to write this story with courage, to make you all proud, but too often my feeble faith finds me curled up in a ball on the floor. God give me the faith and the courage to press on... I need it now more than ever.

As for the latest demonstration of God's power (and sense of humour), we have had a bit of a breakthrough with this latest roadblock. I was so distraught over this documentation dilemma... it seemed to be a virtually impossible task to get this certain powerful government official to sign a document which doesn't even exist yet. It has never been done. It is unorthodox. It is unprecedented. It is impossible.

You see, this is the part where God throws his head back with thunderous laughter! Really? Impossible? Can't be done? The same God who spoke light from his mouth at 299,792,458 m/s can't orchestrate the signing of a piece of paper? It is quite laughable isn't it?

So get this...turns out that this powerful government official I need the signature of...turns out this man's daughter is friends and neighbours of one of my coworker's parents! Are you kidding me? So, they talked to the daughter, and then she phoned her dad and explained the situation. He had never heard of such a strange request before, but was very excited to help in any way he can. So in an impossible, unthinkable, unorthodox, unprecedented, undeniable God ordained turn of events, this powerful government official has agreed to sign anything we need! We're good to go.

The waters have parted once more. The story continues...

Stay tuned.

Hitting The Wall

2008-10-03T19:38:00.001-06:00

I passed my case worker's solution by my lawyer, and she said absolutely no, it won't work. The only document which will work will be virtually impossible to get. For certain reasons I can't disclose the specifics, but I will tell you it involves the unprecedented signature of a very powerful person in government, and the creation of a unique authentication document which has never been created before. Sound confusing? It is.

I am so frustrated with this Nicaraguan government right now, I feel like I am hitting the wall. They are being so ridiculous and difficult. If these documents are not presented exactly as they want them, the judge will never allow me to bring Will to Canada. He will be my son, but I won't be able to bring him home. That thought brings me to my knees. But I refuse to believe that we would come this far just to wave the white flag over this. It's only a piece of paper... We will keep praying for a miracle, and believing that God has everything, including this document in his hands.

Trying to Solve The Documentation Problem

2008-10-03T11:08:00.004-06:00

Well, we're still trying to solve this documentation dilemma. My case worker says they have never encountered this snag before. She doesn't understand what the Nicaraguan government's problem is, but has been working hard to figure out a solution. We have the birth certificate dilemma solved, now it's just the police record issue. My case worker has sent me an idea on how to resolve this, and I will pass it by my lawyer today. Please pray that this solution will be acceptable to the Nicaraguan authorities, and they will understand the Saskatchewan government's position. Pray, pray, pray...

here are some pics from the other night at TGI Friday's...

A Minor Snag, A Major Inconvenience

2008-10-01T18:16:00.003-06:00

I just met with my lawyer...

We hit a small snag. All this time I was thinking that the adoption dossier was accepted without any issues. True, the government did approve the adoption and the court did award legal custody to me. But my lawyer has given 2 of my documents back which she says needs correction. At the final court date, everything needs to be in perfect order. The government is giving me the opportunity to correct some things. The documents she returned are the two government signed documents: my birth certificate and the police record. The Ministry of the Family does not accept notarized copies of those government documents. They need the government to authenticate the signatures on the original documents.

If we are able to make these changes while I'm here, it would involve FedEx'ing the 2 doc back to my case worker, she would send it back to Regina for authentication, then back to Saskatoon, then to the Consulate in Washington, then back to Saskatoon, then to me here in Nicaragua. Having done this process before, I know that it would likely take at least 2 weeks to accomplish, not to mention an additional $600 in authentication and courier fees. I feel so discouraged right now. Like you, I was really praying for a breakthrough, and now it feels like I've taken huge steps backward. I know this can be typical in adoption cases, but i sure didn't need this right now. I have e-mailed my case worker for some advice.

The other documents are still being processed. My lawyer told me that it could be another month before they're ready, but I'm convinced that with God's intervention, it can be next week! By next week I will need to make the decision to return home, or cancel my flight and wait here for things to conclude. My presence is required to obtain Will's passport, so either way I'll need to be here to wait out the Immigration part. It feels like this will never end. I am trying my best to stay positive, to not be discouraged, and hold on to the promises of God, but it can be so hard. I try and remember that now it's no longer a question of 'if', but 'when'. But it is that 'when' question that is driving me into insanity...

But I am with my son in this moment, so will treasure it as best as I can. Oh yeah, today marks the 1 year anniversary of when I sat in Will's shack and invited him to become my son! We are going to the TGIF restaurant to celebrate. Food I recognize! Can't wait.

Please keep praying. Just when I thought it was almost over…but miracles can happen, right?

Too Hard To Explain

2008-09-30T18:05:00.002-06:00

These past few days have been so intense, I really don't know how to explain it. I started this blog over a year ago, partly as a way to document this adventure, and also to allow people to become part of journey. Blogging has become harder and harder lately...the words just don't come anymore. I feel like I've reached the end of my self...

I know that it is not an accurate measure, but the lack of comments on my recent posts make me question if people are even following this story anymore. Readers have likely become disinterested due to the length of this whole process and the great expanses of time between posts. I understand completely. I'm not a faithful blogger. But one of the joys of this whole blogging thing has been to read the kind words of encouragement and messages of support that folks have left. It causes me to remember that I am not alone in this. My closest family and friends are obviously offering their support with or without the blog, but it has been a blessing seeing all the others who have encouraged me along the way. I am thankful for that.

The reality is that pouring out my life on this blog is so hard for me right now, especially if I think that it is not actually being used to encourage people and to invite them to pray specifically for the things that lay before me. I know it sounds really self-serving, but if you have followed this story and you would like me to continue communicating in this way, please leave a brief note so I know it's not all for nothing. Things are really tough right now and I could sure a little reminder that there are people walking with me. I am empty and need a little boost to get through these next few days. Does that make any sense...I hope it does.

peace and grace

Quick Prayer Request

2008-09-29T09:47:00.002-06:00

As most of you know, I am back in Nicaragua. I am here to be with my son, and ultimately to speed up this process so I can bring him home when I return on Oct 10. I have more to report on my first few days here, but you will have to be patient. For right now, all I can tell you is that we are visiting the office of the government this morning. Apparently the department is wanting to ask me a couple of final questions before they will hand over the final documents I need.

Please pray that this meeting will have God's favour upon it, and that we will be able to make a significant step in getting those final papers. Please intercede for us as we meet this morning. I will report later as I am able.

Thanks for your partnership!

Corwin

Will's Bedroom

2008-09-23T00:09:00.004-06:00

I am about to leave for Nicaragua. By Friday night, I will be with my son. The past few weeks have some of the hardest moments of my life...living in the space between...some kind of adoption purgatory. But I will not give up, I must not give up. The end is in site and I am reaching with all my strength to get there. This journey back will hopefully take me to that great completion, when I will finally be able to bring my son home. I don't know what lies ahead, but I never really did anyway. When I return next month, I pray that my son will be beside me. This is still a dream, my hope, something I can try clinging to. I have absolutely no control over these next few steps, and so I must continually release the anxiety and fear to God. He has walked before me this entire time, leaving breadcrumbs on the trail to remind me that I am on the right path. And yet I still doubt, and I still worry...and still I wonder if this consummation will ever actually arrive. And so I wait. And so I hope. Pray for me in these days, as I can barely utter prayers of my own anymore. I need your intercession now more than ever before. Let's pray that this will all be over soon...stay tuned...

In the meantime, here are some photos of Will's bedroom, my former office. I stare at it every day, imagining the moment when my son will finally inhabit that space. Let me know what you think!

Peace.

Good News!

2008-08-29T17:04:00.003-06:00

Good news everyone...Esteban e-mailed me yesterday to tell me that all the messed up birth and death certificates have been fixed! Praise God! Esteban and my lawyer are bringing the new documents to the Ministry of the Family today. The Ministry needs to check through all the new documents to make sure everything lines up properly. Once that is done, we will finally be able to get Wilber's new birth certificate issued, and then his passport. Please pray that Mi Familia will be able to check through these new docs quickly. The office can be backed up at times, and my lawyer will attempt to get them to move quickly on this. My prayer is that this can all be done by the end of next week. God has moved mountains here before, I am continuing to pray for more miracles.

While you are praying, please lift up the immigration process as well. Pray already that when the immigration officers receive all the documents, that there would be no issues and that the permanent residence visa would be issued quickly. I want my son home!

As well, a big thank you to all who supported me and came to the Celebration Night last Monday. I was overwhelmed by your kindness and generous gifts. It meant so much to me. Thanks again.

Peace!

Still Waiting...and Going Crazy in the Meantime!

2008-08-23T20:56:00.007-06:00

Hey friends, not much has happened really. We are still trying to correct the death certificate of Will's birth father, and it's tedious business. In order to speed up the process, I was encouraged by my lawyer to hire a government lawyer. Without some help from a government lawyer, the process of fixing this certificate could take up to four months! With this lawyer, it will only take 1-2 weeks. Having someone working overtime within the government makes all the difference. The catch: this lawyer will need $800 US to complete this task. I don't know what else to do. I desperately want my son home, I am missing out on all these precious moments with him. With school around the corner and autumn about to descend, I feel the urgency now more than ever. So I sent the initial $250 down to get this lawyer working. Things are going well and the documents are set to be completed by next week. Keep praying for that please.

I'll be honest, I'm getting a little concerned about the financial reality of this process. I knew it was going to be expensive, but things have gotten really tight now. I haven't mentioned this very much in my posts, it seemed to be something that I just had to deal with, something I knew from the start would be a struggle. I didn't really want to burden anyone else with these details. I don't even know what to say about it...it is just that honestly, I am feeling some anxiety now. Not only have I had to pay for all of Will's living expenses over the last 6 months, but I have also been paying for the various care givers who have been looking after him. I have had to pay Will's Nicaraguan family members money for work lost, as they had to take a few days off to be in court. The legal fees are adding up as well, primarily because Will's birth father's birth and death certificates are so messed up. This was something I wasn't really prepared for. All the cab fares, car rentals, lawyer lunches...it's been crazy at times. There is always something...It seems like every week I am wiring anywhere from $200 - $1000 down to Nicaragua. I am getting blasted by the transfer fees and exchange rates. I did have to complete some renos on my place as well to get ready for Will. I'm not complaining or want to sound like I'm whining here, these are things that every expecting parent does...it's how it works, you know the deal going in. It's just that sometimes I feel alone, and I worry that when everything is finally complete, I won't have enough to buy a ticket to go get my son.

Maybe these are irrational fears and I need to chill a little bit. But I can't help but think of these things. With my work with Youth For Christ, I have to raise 100% of my salary, so that becomes a reality as well. But I know that God is in control, I see co-workers of mine who have families of 5 who make it work. I need to continue to trust God here, I know.

If you could pray for wisdom here, as I need to make important financial decisions in the next few weeks, and beyond that as well. Pray that I could receive full support at YFC to help alleviate a bit of that anxiety. And pray that I can pull together the funds I need so that I can bring my son home.

Sorry for the ramble, I guess that's why I started this blog in the first place. Thanks again for your overwhelming love, prayers and support.

Corwin

Death Certificate

2008-08-11T12:12:00.002-06:00

Things have been moving nicely, but right now we have become stalled. Before any of Will's new certificates and documents can be processed and given to me, we need to once again get things sorted out with Will's biological dad's death certificate. It was filed incorrectly and doesn't match the dad's birth certificate. So now we had to find 4 people to provide witness that they knew this man and then declare and sign that he is in fact deceased.

Thanks to God, Esteban has the found 4 witnesses we need. They, along with Esteban and my lawyer, are going to a government office today and tomorrow to get this task accomplished. I am having to pay for an extra lawyer to speed up the processing time. I also need to pay some money to the 4 witnesses to compensate for work missed today and tomorrow. (they wouldn't cooperate unless they were compensated) This process is continuing to cost more than I had planned. It seems unending at times...I am running out of money. I can't wait for this part to be finally over and I can shift my focus to raising my son.

Please pray that things will go well today and tomorrow as we get this death certificate mess worked out, and that I can have all the Nicaraguan documents I need by middle of the month. Thanks again for your prayers.

The Journey Ends...(well, part of it does)

2008-07-31T00:45:00.008-06:00

Wow.

Exactly one year ago tonight, on July 30, 2007, I published my first post on my new blog, "Bring Him Home". The first post was titled, "The Journey Begins". Do you remember? Now, exactly one year later, a major part of the journey has ended.

This morning, sometime between 10:30am and 11:30am, in a stuffy Nicaraguan court room, a judge declared to all those present that Corwin Matthew Thiessen of Saskatoon, Canada has been granted full legal parental custody of Wilber Daniel Martinez, who has now become Wilber Daniel Thiessen!

It has been accomplished. The impossible dream that God planted in my heart over a year ago has now been realized. I have a son. I am a father. Done. Many said it couldn't happen. Many thought it wouldn't happen. But there were many more who knew it would...a multitude of love and support that clung to hope and believed that God would prove faithful...and army fighting this battle on their knees. We knew. Even in the darkest hour we knew. Many nights this knowledge was clouded by the tears of discouragement and doubt. But you stayed with me...friends, family and even strangers, interceding, never giving up, fighting for me and with me. Your prayers, your tears, your support and love have kept me going. You have been part of this story, and I am thankful. Thank you for not giving up.

I am reminded again of the lyrics of a Steven Curtis Chapman song that has been kind of like a theme song for me throughout this whole process. The song was released last fall and captured the exact essence of my son's journey ...it felt like Steven wrote it with Will in mind. It is called "Run Home", and as you read these lyrics, be reminded of how good our extravagant Heavenly Father is to us, and how he has adopted each of us into His forever family...

"So long you've journeyed,
Hiding your face from the world
Wondering if your broken heart
Will ever hope again
Now it seems like all your dreams
Have been buried somewhere on the way
But I can hear a new beginning calling your name

Run wild, run free
Like a river on its way to the sea
Show your heart, show your face
Let the fire inside you blaze
Run brave, run strong
Throw your head back and sing out your song
Run wild, run free, run home

The waiting is over, your moment has arrived
The wind is calling out to you,
You were born to live this life
So gather up the memories of
All the hope you've lost on the way
And lift your eyes
The sun is rising on a new day

Go on and join the dance, take a chance
Let your heart dare to believe again,

Run wild, run free
Like a river on its way to the sea
Show your heart, show your face
Let the fire inside you blaze
Run brave, run strong
Throw your head back and sing out your song
Run wild, run free, run home..."

Wilber is now my son. Pretty crazy hey? But the journey is not over...not quite yet. We still need to bring my son home. Stay tuned for what's yet to come.

Blessings

Not Quite...But Close

2008-07-29T00:37:00.001-06:00

Here's the latest: At today's court appearance today the judge simply received all my documents. Looks like Tuesday morning at 9:30am there is another court appearance with Will's aunt and grandmother. The judge will ask if anyone in the family objects to the adoption. He will likely interview Wilber as well. If everything goes well, there will be a final court appearance on Wednesday, when custody is finally granted to me. Please pray that these next few court dates will go smoothly, and that the family will continue to support this process. It seems like they found Will's birth mom this morning, and I have been told that she signed some documents, so that is s very good thing.

My lawyer is not a Christian, but today she told the family that this adoption is a miracle, and that these types of cases are always rejected. The fact that the Ministry of the Family is approving this is an act of God. What a cool reminder of His faithfulness. She also said the process to get me the documents I need for immigration could take another 2 months at the most. I am becoming restless and weary, and I desperately want my son home. Let's pray that things will continue to move quickly, and that my son can be home before summer's end. I believe in miracles. How about you?

I am trying to remember to breathe...

Court Date!!

2008-07-27T22:22:00.000-06:00

Hey friends, I just spoke with Esteban, and it looks like we have a court date tomorrow! Wilber, his aunt, and his birth mom will all be there. I am not exactly sure what is happening at this time, whether or not Wilber will legally be my son by tomorrow, the details are still a little sketchy. But I am told that they are discussing final custody details with the family. This might be the day when I legally become a father! Please pray that everything will go smoothly at court, that God would continue to bring favour to the lawyers, judges, and Wilber's family. The court appearance is at 2:00pm and goes for about an hour or so. PRAY HARD!!! They need to locate Will's birth mom. Last time it took 5 days, so please pray they they find her quickly tomorrow morning. This is the final stretch! I will post more once I know more details.

Here we go...

My Dossier En Route!

2008-07-10T19:12:00.001-06:00

Hey friends, just wanted to ask you to pray. Thanks be to God that on Wednesday afternoon I was able to send all my official documents to my lawyer in Nicaragua. One year ago this week I was sitting at a picnic bench at Manitou Lake Bible Camp, looking out over the lake and wondering if this ridiculous idea to adopt Will could ever possibly come to be, and if I was clinically crazy for even considering the idea. Now here I sit, a year later, as my official adoption dossier makes its way to my lawyer in Managua. It's by the grace and faithfulness of God that I have made it this far. As I signed my final document a few weeks ago, my new case worker, (yes, I ended up with yet another worker..more on that later), told me that she didn't know if it was luck, or some divine intervention, but a case like mine in theory should have been impossible to process. She told me that many couples who work with trusted agencies, and deal with familiar countries are not able to obtain the kinds of documents that I was able to dig up. Everything about my case was so unique and challenging, to get to this point is really a miracle. I told her that I truly believe that God has had his hand on this process from the first day. I pray that God will continue to be glorified through this entire process.

Anyway, my documents are somewhere between Miami and Managua. PLEASE pray that they make it safely to Nicaragua, and that my lawyer will have no trouble getting them from the UPS office. Once they are in her hands, it's a matter of getting them to the government office, and praying that a court date will be set in the next few weeks. I'm still torn over whether or not I should get back down there to ensure that everything is done properly. After the court date I still need to complete the Immigration piece before I can bring my son home. Right now I don't really have the money to make 2 more trips down. I need to make sure I have enough to fly my son and I back home when this is all done. Please pray for wisdom as I need make these difficult decisions.

Thanks again for your prayers. We're getting really close...Let's all pray that my son can be home before the end of August!

Peace...

A Giant Update

2008-06-25T02:12:00.000-06:00

In the weeks to come, I will try my best to bring you up to speed on things. I have so many things to report to you about, including some wild adventures from my latest visit to Nicaragua. In the meantime, here are some important news items that I need to share with you:

Firstly, my adoption dossier was having some issues. Before I left for Nicaragua in May, I gave my case worker all the final pieces so she could send the package to Regina for authentication. My hope was that it would be back in Saskatoon upon my return so I could then forward it on to the Nicaraguan embassy in Washington DC for another round of authentications. Well, when I returned, my case worker informed me that three documents were sent back. On two of the documents the notary had forgot to sign across the notary stamp. This was an annoying inconvenience, but easily remedied. I just went back to that notary to have her sign across the seal. The other was a reference letter from my friend in Calgary. Since the letter was notarized in Alberta, Regina couldn’t authenticate it. I was really frustrated at this news…these documents have been in my case worker’s hands for over 3 months. These are things that could have and should have been brought to my attention a long time ago. Now I had to get my friend to resend his letter, get it notarized here, and then get my translator to retranslate the notary stamp. Ultimately, this resulted in 2 extra weeks being added to the process. It was very disheartening.

Then last week Monday, the dossier was finally ready to be sent to Washington DC for the next round of authentication. (Canada doesn’t have an official Nicaraguan Consulate, so Nicaragua's consular procedures are undertaken through the Nicaraguan Consulate within the Embassy of Nicaragua in Washington). I made out a U.S. money order for $400 to cover the cost of the process, which was $25 per signature, and I thought everything was ready to go. But we couldn’t send it off because we needed a name of who the package went to. That night as I looked for that contact name within an old e-mail, I discovered that I had in fact made a huge mistake! I made the money order out to the Embassy of Nicaragua, when I should have made it out to the Consulate of Nicaragua! So the following Wednesday I took back the money order from my case worker and returned to the bank to have it changed. As it turned out, the money order that I hoped to send two days earlier was invalid…the clerk had forgot to sign it! The bank manager was horrified at the error, and ended up refunding the cost of the money order, which was only $6.50, but still... If it wasn’t for the roadblock of needing that contact name, I would have sent to Washington an invalid money order designated incorrectly…who knows how much time, energy and money would have been required to fix that error. God is constantly trying to remind me that his timing is impeccable. The things that I look at as inconveniences and roadblocks can actually be blessings in disguise. Why do I doubt so easily ? I need to learn to trust more.

The past week many people have been praying that this next part of the process would go by quickly. We all know how much time government process can take. I have to admit I was a little nervous sending my dossier to Washington. To my knowledge it was the first time that my case worker had ever sent a dossier to an embassy outside of Canada for this step of authentication. So last night I took a 1:00am walk to talk to God about some of my fears and worries. I specifically asked that God would bring favour upon this Washington process. Today I received a call…looks like my dossier has already been processed in Washington and is back in the hands of my case worker in Saskatoon! Praise God! It took less than a week for all this to happen. I thank God for his faithfulness here. Thanks to all who were praying specifically for this Washington leg of the journey. Now I am able to send everything to Nicaragua! Finally, after all the struggle and hard work and sleepless nights, after countless visits with my translator and my case worker, after pouring over and completing 27 grueling pages of personal history forms, after an onslaught of seals, stamps, declarations and signatures, and after spending upwards of $6000 to get it all completed, my adoption dossier will finally be in the hands of my lawyer. What a journey it has been, but there are still a few more hoops to jump through, so please keep praying!

In other news, do you recall the letter of intent that I wrote to Mi Familia back in October? This was the letter that the Director of Mi Familia wanted to present to the Board of Directors in February. Since my case is so unique, she wanted the Board to have the opportunity to make a preliminary decision regarding the process. They could decide to approve of my intentions and accept my dossier, or they could decide to say no to the process and not accept any further documentation. With the latter, I would have the opportunity to appeal, but it would make things a lot more difficult. Well, I got word from my lawyer that last week the Board was finally presented with my letter of intention…and… they approved it!! God is so good! They are excited to receive my dossier and to continue this process. This means that another obstacle has been avoided; one more door had been opened. My lawyer already has seen copies of my dossier and she is very impressed by the quality of my documentation. She is very confident that this next part of the process will go quickly.

In regards to that, I still need to fill out the official Nicaraguan adoption application form. I was unable to obtain it while I was in Nicaragua because my lawyer was stranded as a result of the hurricane. My buddy Esteban told me that she has the document and is planning to send it to me. I want to wait on sending the rest of my dossier until I have that application form, so please pray that it will get to me this week.

And finally, today was Father’s Day in Nicaragua. I spoke to Will tonight and he told me that he was really happy because I am his dad. He also told me that I was in his thoughts all throughout the day, and that it was my special day. He then said, “I love you dad, I love you…” Waiting to bring my son home is excruciating, now more than ever. Please pray fervently that I will able to bring him home this summer, so we can begin our new life here. Thanks again for you kind words and support. I can feel it…

God bless you, and stay tuned…

Surviving The Hurricane

2008-05-31T11:20:00.000-06:00

\I have so much to tell you. I have been in Nicaragua since May 23, and so much has happened. Finding internet access has been a bit sketchy lately, as in the past week the Baptist Convention of Nicaragua has decided to cease operations of PROVADENIC. This has meant that the ladies who work cooking and cleaning no longer have jobs. The offices are locked and no one comes to the complex anymore. While we can still sleep there, everything else has come to a screeching halt, including getting internet access. So there hasn't been much opportunity to post.

Yes there was a hurricane, and yes I survived! But what is yet to be determined is whether i can survive this hurricane called parenting...but more on that later.

The real prayer request right now is for my meeting with my lawyer. Because of the hurricane, she has been stuck up in the north part of the country. We have been unable to contact her for the last 3 days. My meeting with her is crucial and needs to happen before Monday. Please pray that we can contact her and that the meeting can happen. I will post more about my latest adventures when I have more time. In the meantime, here is a pic of Will and me. He always looks alot bigger in pictures...he really isn't that big. It's an optical illusion!

Peace...

Major Meeting and Minor Meltdown

2008-05-13T01:27:00.000-06:00

I just spoke with Esteban, and he told me that today (Tuesday May 13), Will and his aunt are meeting at the office of Mi Familia to sign some forms. From what I gathered, they are documents to finalize the death certificate of Will's birth father which was never properly registered. My understanding is that this allows Will's birth certificate to be legally correct. It makes me happy to know that things are happening down there, and that my lawyer is working. My prayer is that this finalization of the death certificate and the legalization of Will's newly corrected birth certificate are the final steps before the ministry receives my dossier.

I took a long walk tonight and became consumed with thoughts of the future...what the plane ride home to Canada will be like...will it be silent? Will my son be extremely sad and scared? Or will he be beside himself with nervous excitement? I began to think about what we will talk about, about taking him through the various security checks, having to produce documentation...I thought about our plane's final taxi into Saskatoon airport...getting through immigration...and finally stepping out into the terminal, into a new life, a new reality. I thought of who will be there to meet us...what will my son do? What will he be thinking? Will my mom start crying? Will he be able to embrace his new family? What will the drive home be like? I thought about the first time he steps into his new home...his first night in his new room...what will I make him for breakfast? What will we do the first full day he's home? Who will we see? Where will we go? How will he be feeling? What about the day after that, the day after that? How will his English be? How quickly will he adapt? How long will it take to begin to find a normal routine? What kind of father will I be? Am I actually ready for this?

I began to panic as a thousand images flooded my mind. It was a sudden release of thought and emotion that I could not contain. I have been so consumed with the process of getting Will home, in many ways I haven't given myself the proper space to truly consider what I will do when he actually gets here. Maybe I can't go there yet. Maybe I'm not supposed to go there yet. I can't possibly predict the uncertainties of the future. I can barely grasp the reality of the immediate. It still feels like a dream, and alternate reality that is floating just beyond my grasp. Yes, there have been moments along this journey that have been so incredibly raw and visceral, they have reminded me of the true nature of this quest. But it's those in between moments, the endless parade of forms and documents, the waiting...the endless waiting that becomes excruciating and at the same time renders me numb to reality. When the numbness wears off and I begin to feel again..when I begin to truly consider what lies ahead of me...there is an unmistakable truth which I cannot escape:

I am so scared.

May God give me courage to step into these moments with the same unbridled passion and fearlessness that he granted at the beginning. May I cling to the unwavering strength of his hand, and may He grant me the resolve to not let go...

Trouble At School

2008-05-06T22:45:00.001-06:00

I was talking to Esteban today, and Will has started another round of English lessons. This is the third program I have enrolled him in. Please pray that this one will actually help him develop his ability and that he can maintain a positive attitude. It seems that Will has not be on his best behaviour at his regular school, and the principal is threatening to remove him from class if he doesn't improve. Esteban told me that Will likes to goof around and not pay attention to his teachers. It is so frustrating to know that my boy is not doing his best and I can't be there to push him to succeed. It is virtually impossible to know exactly what is going on from this distance. I know that I will need to return to Nicaragua soon to encourage my son and make sure that he gets the discipline he needs to become successful. For the time being, please pray that Will can realize that he needs to step it up and do his best, and that God's Spirit will give him the discipline and focus that he desperately needs.

Moving Closer...

2008-04-29T22:23:00.000-06:00

Today I went to the government office in Saskatoon and signed the final piece of the adoption dossier, a commitment form that says I will conduct post-placement reports on Will until he is of legal age. With that, my case worker couriered the final three documents to my translator. He says he should have them all ready by next week. Then it's a matter of going over everything carefully, sending it to Regina for legalization, and then off to the Nicaraguan consulate in Ottawa. Once they return back to me I can finally get them off to my lawyer in Nicaragua. I am praying that my lawyer can have them in her hands by mid-late May. Please pray for that as well.

On a slightly different note, I am currently finishing up a documentary I filmed in Nicaragua in 2007. It's called "All That Remains", and it tells the story of my project serve team that left the comfort of home to serve the people of Veracruz. I hope that people can be inspired by the story. I plan to release the film in early summer, but until then, here is the official trailer. Please let me know your thoughts...I value the opinions of fresh eyes. Thanks.

Highs and Lows

2008-04-20T22:04:00.000-06:00

So I guess 'coming soon' actually means 6 days, but who's pointing fingers? There's a bit to tell you, so here it goes:

For those wondering, yes we found Will. He had gone to Veracruz for the weekend, but had remained there into Monday. Esteban tried to bring him back, but once he arrived back at the college, Will began to cry. He emphatically told Esteban that he couldn't remain there...it was like a prison. What I found later was that he was the youngest in his class, and he was three levels behind everyone. The 20 something's in the class were apparently very mean to Will, calling him stupid donkey for not understanding English. He had no friends, and no place he felt comfortable going. He was alone and scared, and he felt guilt and shame for 'wasting' the money we were spending to keep him there. He was not in a very good head space and it seems his self-confidence was taking a beating as well. Initially I wanted him to stick it out and learn a lesson in perseverance, but after hearing about his experience I felt that it was doing more harm than good to keep him there. But where could he go? His aunt has recently said that he is not allowed to stay with her anymore. (Good for the overall adoption case, but not that great for the immediate)

Turns out that Esteban's brother Jacob lives and works in Veracruz, in fact he works at the orphanage as a care giver and a driver. He has known Will for the last few years and has a good relationship with him. He is allowing Will to stay with him for the next few months. This is an answer to prayer. Will is attending regular classes again in Veracruz, and the plan is for him to attend English classes at a different school in Managua from 2:00pm-5:00pm on weekdays. I am praying that living and going to school with his friends will give him the internal boost he needs and put him in a good head space to learn. It does worry me a bit that there may be a lack of structure and discipline in Jacob's house. But I feel that Will is much safer in Veracruz than in the center of Managua's ghetto. Please pray that he can be disciplined in his studies and make good choices while living in Veracruz. I gave Esteban money to buy Will a new phone, but I have not been having much success calling him on it. He tells me that the battery is bad, but my hunch is that he doesn't like his 'cheap' phone and simply leaves it lying around.

As far as the adoption process is concerned, I am still asking you all to pray that Will could be home by summer. That may be unrealistic, but I believe that God can work a miracle here seeing as he has been working miracles this whole time. I need to trust His timing, but we can pray with fervor for this miracle. I am beginning to see the end in sight.

Yesterday I had my final home study meeting with my practitioner! My home study is done!! Wow, what a journey that has been. It went wonderfully, and my practitioner was so incredibly supportive. Her heart has been captured with the story of Wilber, and she can't wait for me to begin my new life with him. Her endorsement was very emphatic and whole hearted, so I am very thankful to God for that. This is the final piece needed to finally assemble the rest of my dossier. All the other documents have been translated into Spanish already, so my translator is awaiting the final few pieces. The translation has ended up being the most expensive part of the process thus far. $0.30/word quickly adds up!

My practitioner was planning to present my home study to my case worker today. Tomorrow I am going to bring the rest of my dossier to the department. Hopefully by the end of the week my completed dossier can be send to the Nicaraguan consulate in Ottawa for authentication. Following that it can finally make its way to my lawyer in Nicaragua for one more round of authentication. It is then finally ready to be presented to Mi Familia in Managua. Then it is a matter of waiting for them to process the documents and order a court date. Please pray for all these processes, that they would go quickly and efficiently, and that everyone involved will look favourably on everything. I am praying for a June court date. Care to join me in that request?!

The final piece of news is regarding Immigration/Citizenship. According to a new amendment, adoptive parents are now able to bypass the 'permanent residency' immigration process and go directly to the citizenship process if they choose. It is supposed to speed things up and be less hassle. But from what I was hearing, the new citizenship process has some glitches, and some of the embassies are not all up to speed on the new procedures. I have decided to go the old route: apply for permanent residency for Will, and then apply for citizenship after he's home. The first part of the process is being approved by the government to become a 'sponsor' for your child. This approval basically indicates that the government feels you are financially able to care for the 'immigrant', and not put strain on the economy.

After painstakingly working through this initial application form, and re-checking it probably 25 times, I set off to send it to the processing centre in Mississauga. I sent it Express-Post so I could track it. I sent it off on Friday, April 4, with a guarantee that it would arrive on Monday, April 7. That Monday I went to the Canada Post website and entered the tracking number, but it said it had never heard of my package! When I phoned Canada Post directly, they too said they couldn't locate it, and that it probably ended up in the 'reject' pile. This was not happening. I put a call in to my mom, who gathered people at Bethany College to pray. We prayed at my office as well...

Early the next morning (Tuesday, April 8), I went online and skeptically entered the tracking number one more time...and this time...it told me that the package had been delivered!! Praise Jesus! I could now rest knowing that my Immigration sponsorship application papers were delivered to the right hands. Now we began to pray that they would be processed quickly. I know how the government can work. Needless to say I was praying for the best.

Last Monday, April 14, I casually went to my mailbox, and what do you know? There was an official looking letter from Immigration Canada! That was fast...they received the application, processed it, and sent the decision to me in less that one week! Remarkable. I quickly opened it and scanned the contents...If printed words could make sounds, then these ones were singing the most beautiful melody. I have officially been approved as a sponsor for Wilber! Part one is good to go. Now I have to wait to fill out the next set of forms...but it is getting closer. Can you feel it? Is it actually happening?

Thanks for your prayers and support. We're getting close. Keep looking to the prayer request section for updates...they get updated more often. Keep praying!

Corwin

New Update Coming Soon!

2008-04-15T00:51:00.000-06:00

Sorry I've been so bad at this! I have lots of news to share, including some new exciting developments on the Immigration front. My home study will be complete on Thursday, and most of my dossier is already translated into Spanish, so things are moving. Will is back in Veracruz, more to come on that in the coming days. Take a look at the 'Prayer Requests' list for a current list of prayer items. Stay tuned and keep praying! Thanks...

Corwin

Urgent Prayer Request

2008-03-31T10:31:00.000-06:00

Many of you know that I enrolled Will in an Academic English course at a college 1/2 hour from Managua. He is studying English from 8:00am-3:30pm every day. He is living with a host family off campus. My good friend Esteban has been my eyes and ears while Will makes this transition. There is alot more to this story, but the main point is that Wilber has been struggling to adjust and to get good marks. He e-mailed me last week to say he wants to go back to Veracruz and take the Saturday course at the English school. He lost his phone, so it has been very hard to contact him.

I received an e-mail today from the academic dean that Will didn't show up for class today. Apparently he told some people that he is dropping out and taking the Saturday course. Last Friday he had asked the dean for some money to travel, but she didn't give him any. I spoke to the lady at the house where he stays, and she told me that he slept there last night and that he was there this morning. I have no way of knowing where he is. I can't get a hold of Esteban right now either, so I guess you can say that I have very upset and concerned. Please pray that I can get in touch with my son, and that things can work out. Pray that he can have the self confidence to continue his studies and learn English. I just need lots of prayer right now. Thanks.

Corwin

Alot of News...

2008-03-09T23:04:00.000-06:00

Hello friends and family. Alot has happened since my January visit, and there's much to praise God for. There is also alot to pray for. I will do my best this week to bring you all up to date on what has happened, and what is yet to come.

For now, I want to point you to another blog for a different perspective this whole adventure:

http://www.psnicaragua.blogspot.com

I recently returned from Nicaragua with Project Serve, the short term mission trip that I direct every year. In February we brought 12 high school students from the Saskatoon area down to Nicaragua for 10 incredible days. This year's trip was quite different for me, as Wilber was with us the whole time. Balancing my roles as trip director and as Will's dad became a very interesting dynamic. Seeing Will try and relate to Canadian young people only a few years older than himself was also a very unique dynamic. Chandra, the trip nurse, was very faithful at documenting the whole adventure daily in blog format, so please feel free to get caught up through her writings. I hope you are as inspired and moved by reading about each moment as we were actually living them. Please feel free to leave comments on this blog and let me know your thoughts. Cheers.

The Elusive Abandonment Document pt 5

2008-01-09T22:28:00.000-06:00

How can I even begin to explain the highs and lows of the last 24 hours? Is this really my life now? I know that so many of you have been praying for me and Will as we attempted to get that ever elusive abandonment document signed by Will’s birth mom (Bertha). We have been searching for her for three days with no success. As you have already read, Will’s aunt, (Yoconda), was able to miraculously find her this morning around 10:00am. When I told the news to Will, his face became aglow with a renewed sense of hope. He ran to where I was standing, threw his arms around me and kissed my shoulder. He laughed out loud and began to dance around. He flipped over onto his bed and kicked his feet in the air with jubilation. However, the sheer elation of the moment was met head on with the sobering reality that I needed to be at the airport by 11:00am. The process of getting Bertha to the PROVADENIC and then getting all of us to a notary office would be a lengthy one, and we had such a small window of time to complete it. In addition, the notary could choose to retype the entire document on their letterhead, which would eat up valuable time. But hey, this is what we’ve all been praying for, so might as well go for it, right?

My translator Frank told me he had to quickly run to the library, but would be back in 20 minutes. He figured that it would take at least half an hour for Bertha and Yoconda to make it to the PROV. Within five minutes of Frank leaving we received a call that they were only three minutes from arriving! I tried to phone Frank, but my phone was out of minutes. I frantically raced though the giant complex trying to find a phone to use. I was finally successful in contacting Frank, and he quickly made his way back. In the meantime, I went outside with Will in preparation of the big arrival. My heart was pounding in my chest as I contemplated meeting Will’s birth mother for the first time. My mind was racing…what would she look like? Would I see my son in her face or in her eyes? What am I going to say to this woman, the one who abandoned my son when he was little? It was hard to focus my thoughts. Will’s uncle had already made it to the PROV on his modest motorbike, he too waiting for the big arrival.

Then the unbelievable happened. As we looked on down the street, we watched in disbelief as Yoconda and Bertha's cab raced by…they missed the turn off! Without a moment of hesitation, Will’s uncle jumped on his bike and raced down the street after the cab. Will stood there with his mouth open, his uncle’s helmet still in his hands. Was this really happening? Frank arrived on the scene and tried to phone Yoconda. They had been dropped off down another street and were walking to the PROV. Time was ticking away, and yet this mysterious serenity fell over me. I knew that God was in control.

The moment finally came…the saw the two women slowly approaching me. I stood frozen for a second, trying to fully take in the moment. I greeted Yoconda, and then quickly glanced over to where Bertha was standing. There she was...the woman who gave birth to my son. As I studied her face, I noticed some of Will’s physical traits within the weathered and wrinkled skin. The same mouth, the same cheek bones…but the eyes…her eyes were nothing like my son’s. Her eyes were exhausted, cold, lifeless. There was no essence, no sparkle, and no sense of wonder. Her eyes expressed a hopelessness and a joylessness that I have rarely seen, even amongst the poorest of the poor. In that moment, I felt compassion. I felt pity for this woman who the world forgot. I reached out my hand and said, “Hello, it’s good to meet you.” She took my hand and responded, “You as well.” And that was it. Will stood at a distance next to his uncle. When Yoconda asked Will to come and say hello to his mother, Will’s face told the story…his eyes spoke anger, sadness and shame. He turned his face and then his back and refused to look at Bertha for one more second. I felt so much pain for my boy, but I knew that I could never understand the hurt of his past. I just pray I can be part of the restoring promise of the future.

We all hopped into a cab and made our way to the nearest notary office. The time was 10:45am. We explained the situation to the notary and showed her the document. She told me that if her signature and stamp on my document was sufficient, she would complete it in that manner. She handed the document to Bertha to read and to sign. My heart was pounding again in my chest as I watched her eyes peruse the letter. It is a very intense piece of paper. In it she declares that she abandoned Will and never cared for him. It also declares that she consents to the adoption process and for the permanent residency and citizenship to Canada. After reading the document, would she still agree to sign it?

She put the paper down, looked up and said, “I can’t sign this. I don’t want Wilber to think that I abandoned him.” My heart stopped for a moment. Frank began to explain some things to her about the process and what is required. She looked at Frank, then at me, then back to the document. She paused. Her eyes darted back and forth across the page. Another pause. She slowly stood to her feet, walked over to the table and placed the paper down onto it. She stared down at that paper with such intensity I thought it would spontaneously combust. She sighed…and then, in one glorious moment, at 10:57am on Wednesday, January 09, 2008…Bertha Julia Martinez Anton signed her name on a Declaration of Abandonment! It was done. Finished. Completed. I pray that now I can finally finish my paperwork back home and move to the next part of the process.

As we stepped back out into the blinding sun, Bertha spoke a few words to Yoconda. She told her that she would like to know when everything is done because she would like to say goodbye to Wilber and his new father. As I turned to her, she smiled a toothless smile, took my hand and quietly said, “Gracias.” I smiled and said, “Dios te bendgia”, or, “May God bless you.”

God is good and very faithful. Thank you for the part you are playing in this story. Stay tuned…

The Elusive Abandonment Document pt 4

2008-01-09T09:55:00.000-06:00

WE FOUND HER!! Will's aunt found the mother this morning. Now it is a race to get her to the PROVADENIC and the then get the document signed and notarized by 11:30am. We have only 1 1/2 hours to accomplish this. I need to get to the airport by 12:00pm at the latest, as my flight home leaves at 1:00pm. Please pray that things could go smoothly. Thanks for your prayers. We're not finished yet!!

The Elusive Abandonment Document pt 3

2008-01-08T13:12:00.000-06:00

It's Tuesday 1:00pm. We still haven't found Will's birth mother. I covet your continued prayers that Will's aunt could miraculously find her this afternoon. Time is running out. Thanks.

The Elusive Abandonment Document pt 2

2008-01-07T12:12:00.000-06:00

Looks like I misunderstood the situation. Will's aunt did not find the birth mom yesterday. At this very moment, she is traveling around Managua trying to find her. Please be in prayer with me that we can find the mom in time to get this document signed. Thanks.

The Elusive Abandonment Document

2008-01-07T00:05:00.000-06:00

I have been trying to get a hold of that elusive document since October...one signed by Will's birth mom declaring that she abandoned him as a baby. This document does not exist here and cannot exist here, because by Nicaraguan law, any child abandoned by both his parents but cared for in any capacity by a relative is not considered abandoned. The reality is that Will was abandoned and never cared for by his mother. The Saskatchewan government would very much like confirmation of that fact. My understanding is that even if there is a relative providing care, if the mother left Will as a baby this is considered abandonment by our government. An abandonment document would also be a tremendous asset when it comes time for the immigration process. Our government would also like to see a document signed by Will's birth mother giving consent for the adoption and for Will's permanent residency and citizenship in Canada. The setback is that the Nicaraguan government will never release an abandonment document, and a consent document which also absolves all rights to the child will not be signed here until all my paperwork is completed. This has been a complicated and frustrating process.

But I had an idea. I had a lawyer friend in Saskatoon help me draw up a document that could do the trick. My case worker back home agreed that it would probably be what we need to allow me to finally finish the home study and assemble all my documents. It declares abandonment and declares consent for adoption and Canadian residency and citizenship. The concern was whether or not we could get this document privately signed and notarized apart from any Nicaraguan government process. Would this be illegal? Would this action put the rest of the process in jeopardy? Would the mother be willing to sign this thing? This is becoming a make or break document.

One moment...

Will just brought me a cup of coffee. It's perfect...

So I spoke with my lawyer here, and her opinion is that if my government needs this document, then I have the right and obligation to get it. She doesn't see any problems with it. As long as the mother knows that she'll need to sign another official document for Mi Familia, we'll be fine. And it's not illegal! This is great news. But can we get the mother to sign? Can we even locate her? I found out recently that Will's birth mother is transient and has no home. She wanders all over this sprawling city. Will's aunt was going to try and find her today to ask her to come with us to the Notary office tomorrow (Monday). I was praying that she would be able to locate this woman. I just spoke with the aunt, and she found her! Looks like we'll all be making a trip to the Notary office tomorrow morning! I am going to meet Will's birth mother for the first time, which is going to be really surreal and kind of awkward. I don't know what I am going to say to her...please pray for this. I don't want her to change her mind and refuse to sign.

If all goes as planned, by the end of Monday I will have the elusive letter signed, notarized and in my hands. I pray that this will be enough to finally release me to complete all the paperwork back home. My dream is to have all my documents in the hands of Mi Familia by early February. Please pray that this can happen.

I have some other interesting developments with the government to tell you about, so stay tuned. For now just pray for me as I attempt to meet with the new Director of Mi Familia tomorrow or Tuesday.

Huge Learning Curve

2008-01-05T11:36:00.000-06:00

Will is at his English class, so I finally have a moment to bring you up to date on what's been happening.

Some have said that absence makes the heart grow fonder. This could not be farther from my experience. Every moment that I have been present with Will has solidified, deepened and strengthened our heart connection. With each day our father/son relationship becomes more defined...more tangible. It's undeniable. And then again, within this new awareness and reality is an unconscious panic that lies just beneath the surface. What am I doing? Is this actually happening? Is this really where the story of my life has brought me? Do I actually have what it takes to be effective as a parent to this kid? The learning curve has been overwhelming at times and I'm not sure if I'm passing the grade yet. But it continues to be one exhilarating ride!

Christmas with my son has been wonderful. I’ve enjoyed seeing his face light up with each new surprise and every new gift. I started off slowly...a new shirt here, some new pants there. Every morning Will has discovered more things stuffed into his Christmas stocking. Just when he thinks the surprises are over, there is one more around the corner. It has been interesting to see his reaction to all this. For the most part, he has responded with humility and genuine thankfulness. My fear was that I would send the wrong message by giving him so many gifts. I kept reminding him that these things were meant as a blessing, but my love for him as his father would never be reduced or identified by an assortment of material possessions. But as many of you have already deduced, it is very difficult to not want to spoil this kid and buy him every possible thing he could ever want. The number of gifts from others sent down with me is evidence of that. This is something I'll need to work through over time. As for the gifts...Will absolutely loves his iPod, his new camera and his new cell phone. He also loves all his new clothes, though a few items didn't fit on account of Will adding some girth over the past two months!

We have some very interesting and wonderful conversations. In one instance, Will was asking me (again) to buy him a camera phone, and I told him directly that I wouldn't. He quickly turned his face away from me and became noticeably distant...this is something that parents also call 'pouting'. I explained to him that he needed to trust me and not become upset with me. I also told him that I knew things that he didn't know and that he needed to be patient. That didn't go over as well as I hoped. But the next day after Will had received his new camera, he came up to me and apologized for being upset the day before. He told me that I was right and he needs to trust me more. This was a very special moment for me as a fledgling parent.

We have had some long debates over whether or not professional wrestling is real or fake. He didn't know that it was scripted and that it is mostly a soap opera. He was a little disappointed, but was content to know that at least some of the impact and moves are real.

In regards to the future, Will says he needs a good paying job because he has three families to support: his aunt in Nicaragua, me, and his future wife and kids. This kid thinks alot...

After receiving all his new clothes, I taught Will how to hang up his clothes properly on the rod, with all the hangers facing the same direction: curve out. Then I taught him how to organize his clothes by type: t-shirts, polos, button downs, and then track jackets/hoodies. He caught on fast. I'm ridiculous right?

Will dropped a bombshell a few days ago. He told me that in 2005 a family from Texas tried to adopt him. All the paperwork was in order and things were in process. But Will refused to give his consent to the adoption! He stopped the process from happening. Everyone thought he was crazy; why would he pass up this amazing opportunity? Will told me that in his heart he knew it wasn't right and it wasn't his time. So it never happened. Will knew that there would something else in his future. And here's the really crazy part of the story: One night in March 2007, just after Will had left the orphanage, God gave him a very specific dream. Will told me that in the dream, God told him that after six months he would receive another opportunity to be adopted. Six months later, in late September of 2007, guess who showed up?

I was humbled and amazed when the reality of Will’s words sunk in. More and more I sense that this has been in God's heart and mind forever and that He has purposed this for Will and me. As I look toward the future with all its uncertainties and potential obstacles, I need to hold on to One who has brought us safe thus far, and the One who will lead me, (and my son) home.

Stay tuned for more stories…

Some New Christmas Pics

2008-01-03T00:34:00.001-06:00

New Post with New Photos Coming Tonight!!

2008-01-02T12:01:00.000-06:00

Discouraged

2007-12-19T16:26:00.000-06:00

I'm so discouraged right now. I don't what is happening anymore. It seems that our government sent a letter to the Nicaraguan government, asking them to confirm that they will accept a single applicant. I am scared that this letter will make the Nicaraguan government nervous, or that they might change their mind and deny my application. Please pray that they will remember my case, and that they will continue to work with my application. I need to maintain favour with the government.

I am almost finished my home study paperwork...but I can't proceed with the rest of the study until we have confirmation that Nicaragua will work with my application. We also need some kind of document that Will is eligible for adoption. Please pray that these documents can be obtained. I desperately want to get my dossier completed.

My new case worker here also said is really skeptical that the Federal government will allow Wilbur to enter Canada. She feels that they will want to keep him with his aunt. She says success with immigration is hit or miss...it all depends on which officer you get and what mood they are in. She is worried that they will see this as an adoption of convenience, a scheme to get Will into the country. Please pray that when the time comes, the immigration process will happen smoothly and successfully. I can't imagine not being able to bring Will home.

My mind is so full of fear and doubt right now. Please pray that I can continue to have faith that God is working out these details.

2 Months Later...Get Ready!

2007-12-03T23:43:00.000-06:00

No, you're not dreaming...this is an actual update!!! I have to admit, I feel rather ashamed that I allowed 2 whole months to go by without a single post. Coming home was so much more difficult than I imagined. Trying to process everything while trying to resume my normal routine was very challenging. I purposely put off the blog thinking that after a week or two I'd have the words and energy to return to it. Well, weeks turned into months, and the longer I waited the more overwhelmed I became at the thought of starting again. How can I effectively explain what has all happened over the past 8 weeks? I'll have to try. I need to honour all of you who have been so supportive and kind throughout my journey. The reality is you have become part of my journey, and as such, I feel like I must keep you in tune with what is happening. So here is a rather quick snapshot of life since coming home.

My love for my son has grown everyday. There is barely a moment that passes that I am not thinking about Will, about his safety, about whether or not he has had a solid meal. What has kept me sane is my daily chat with him on the phone. The cell I bought for him in June has been an invaluable gift for us. With a few exceptions, I have talked with Will every day since coming home. In fact, he started it. The day after I got home, Will sent a text message asking if I got home ok. The next morning at 7:00am he sent another text to say "Good Morning Papa." These initial contacts after coming home were incredibly precious to me, but they also broke my heart. Everyday I woke to the reality that my son was thousands of miles away. Will often sent me texts saying simply, "Te quiero papa", or, "I love you papa." The messages are amazing, but actually talking to him is so much better.

My friend Kristin has been providing me with Liberty/Premier Plus $20 long distance phone cards. These cards have proven to be the best out there, because one $20 card gives me 100 minutes of calling time to Nicaragua! It doesn't cost Will anything for me to call him, so I usually call at least once or twice a day. We talk about our daily activities, his classes at school, and how he is feeling. Sometimes he wants to hear his favourite song, so I play it on my laptop and then hold the phone close to the speaker so he can hear it. He loves that! We'll often reminisce about our spirited soccer matches, and he is very good a reminding me that he is always the champion! We also practice his English vocabulary.

Will started his English classes a few weeks ago. He takes a taxi to the English school every Saturday morning at 7:30am, and is done around noon. He has lunch at the college before coming home to work on his lessons. I was a nervous wreck his first day of school. I phoned him at 6:30am to make sure he was up...I phoned again at 7:30am to make sure he was safely in a taxi...and then I phoned once more at 1:30pm to make sure he got home safely and that he got lunch. He loves his English class so much. He feels like a pretty big deal...taking a taxi to the school, eating pizza or hamburgers for lunch...yeah, it's been really good. He loves practicing his words with me. He enjoys saying "no problem", "I understand", and "very nice." At the end of every call I always tell him I miss him and that I love him, and a few weeks ago he responded for the first time in English and said, "I love you". It was an amazing moment to hear him say it in my language. Now he has this thing where he says, "I love you...forever!" So cute.

Will is on summer vacation now until early February, so I worry alot about his safety. This is first time in over 4 years that he is spending his holidays with his aunt in that dangerous neighbourhood. It makes me sad that he has no safe place to play soccer, or to just be a kid. Being stuck in that dilapidated house is not my idea of fun, but it's the safest place to be for now. I am considering moving him into a daily 2 hour English course at the same college which would get him out of the house every day. But this is a considerable cost, with daily taxi and lunch, so we'll have to see.

I am returning to Managua on December 30th, and I cannot wait to be with my son again. I am anxiously counting down the days. Will is super excited as well. He explained excitedly that when I am there he won't have any school, so we can be together all the time. Being away from Will has been excruciating at times, so I plan to cherish every moment of the 10 days I will have with him. He has already asked me if we can go to a movie the day after I arrive! What a kid!

On the official government side of things, the process has been up and down. My wonderful case worker here has moved to a different department, so I am in the process of getting a new one. Please pray that my new case worker will be as passionate about me and Will becoming a family as my previous one was. (and still is...) I'm a little nervous about the change, but I need to continue to trust God.

I have 'unofficially' begun the home study, which is completely overwhelming at times. 27 pages of questions requiring me to reveal the intimate details of every area of my life. I am trying to attack it one section at a time so I won't completely lose my mind. It is a daunting task, but very do-able. It's nothing I can't accomplish purposefully and passionately. I keep a picture of Will in front of me to provide motivation as I write.

I say I am 'unofficially' beginning my home study because my application to the Sask Government to adopt Will has still not been 'officially' accepted. The head office in Regina is feeling good about the whole thing, but they would still like one more document which would indicate that Will was abandoned by his birth mother. Without that documentation we cannot proceed with the home study, which means I can't finish getting my adoption dossier completed. I am trying to see how I can acquire this document without going through Mi Familia in Nicaragua. Mi Familia will not release the document until they have my completed dossier. But I can't complete my dossier here until have have that document. So you can see my dilemma... My new case worker here will be going through my file on Wednesday and then advising me on what we can do to give Regina the proof they need to finally officially release me into this process. Please pray that perhaps the government here will let me complete the dossier without having all the pieces together.

I talked with Nubia today, (my Nicaraguan lawyer), and I am very frustrated. Nubia has been sick recently, and told me that she hasn't even touched Will's birth certificate correction yet. It's been two months, and I was hoping that would be done by now. Please pray that my lawyer's health would improve, and that she will be able to quickly and efficiently get Will's birth certificate legally corrected.

So that is it for now...sorry this was so long. I promise I won't wait another 2 months until the next post! Please keep praying for Will and for this whole process. I know that God is working, so let's claim His faithfulness. I have always envisioned bringing Will home sometime next May, so let's pray that God would allow that to happen. It might be unrealistic, but God is the God of the impossible! Thank again for all your kindness, prayers and support. You truly are a blessing to Will and to me.

With Thanksgiving

2007-10-09T15:26:00.000-06:00

As I sit here in the Houston airport, and the rain is stirring the sticky Texas air, I am trying desperately to process the last 10 days. I suppose I'll be in process for awhile. It's like trying to wake up from being completely awake. Yes…I am awake now. I am fully awake to the beauty of divine destiny. I am breathing deeper, living richer, seeing clearer. I feel entirely complete, and yet entirely broken. This morning I had to say goodbye to Will. Somehow I kept my emotions in check, but I was dying inside. It was so hard to let go. Once I passed security and Will was out of site, any hope of staying in control was lost. The tears flowed again. The thought of leaving Will behind was more than I could handle. The last 10 days have changed me forever. I listen to stories from my friends who, upon becoming parents for the first time, tell of new perspectives of life and love. Now I understand. Being called 'father' for the first time did something to me, deep in the fabric of my being. There is also something very powerful about connecting with the mission that God gives. It transcends emotions or feelings, but drives relentlessly to one's life core, to the essence of life itself.

And still, the lingering sensation of separation is unavoidable. I feel ripped from my kid, and I long to wrap my arms around him again to reassure him that he is loved and that he matters. This week I saw Will transform from a cowering, insecure and shame filled boy into a confident, uninhibited, and joy filled young man, unafraid to laugh out loud…unafraid to dance again. This week Will was important, he was treasured, he was embraced, he was loved, and he was worth fighting for. Maybe it was a dangerous thing to get so close, to love him that much in light of all the uncertainty that lies ahead. Will is a long way from legally becoming my son, but try and tell that to my heart. Is it wrong for me to risk everything for the sake of love? I can’t let fear of the future keep me from loving my kid. For 10 days Will had a dad, and I had a son. And strangely enough, it felt right. And God was there in the midst of it all, putting things in motion that I didn't know I was ready for. Is this making sense? Have I lost touch with reality?

Last night I celebrated thanksgiving with Will. We sat down to a fine meal of fried chicken, fries, rice, and of course sliced beets. There was fresh watermelon for dessert. Not quite pumpkin pie, but it was great. We had one final game of soccer before getting packed up to leave. Will wanted to watch Princess Bride one more time. He made it as far as the ‘cliffs of insanity’ before falling asleep on my shoulder. I treasured my final moments with him.

As I return home, it’s impossible for me to grasp how I can slide back into the normal routine. It’s going to be difficult to be home again. But I trust God’s timing, and I will continue to fight as hard as I can until Will is home. There are so many obstacles ahead, so I’d ask for your continued prayer as we journey together. Thank you so much for all your support and kind words. My heart is full as I read the many wonderful comments that have been left. It reminds me that I am not alone on this journey. And it’s really only just beginning…

Stay tuned.

What a Ride...

2007-10-08T01:19:00.000-06:00

As I write this, Will is now sleeping after watching a movie together. Turns out 'The Princess Bride' is his new fav movie. I am exhausted and bruised from some intense soccer action this evening. (It's a good thing I have such a disposition for sports!) But I’ll take these bruises. There was a moment tonight when I wasn’t sure if I’d get one final futbol match with Will. Let me explain:

You see, there was an incident today in Veracruz, some words said between Will and me that became a huge misunderstanding. I could sense the Devil trying hard to tear down what God had built up over the past few days. I was left feeling sick to my stomach and emotionally destroyed. When Roberto tried to fix the problem, he made it worse. Will felt such shame because of the misunderstanding that he completely shut down on me. But I had no idea what was happening. Was he angry at me? Did he think I was angry with him? Was he ashamed of what he said? Was all this happening too fast for him?

I quickly discovered that Will can be very stubborn. He refused to talk to me, respond to me, even look at me...he wouldn't even sit with me on the bus, and he even got into the front seat of the taxi so he wouldn't sit by me. I felt so helpless. Is this a cultural thing? I didn’t know what to do. We got back to the PROVADENIC and things got worse. I tried to talk to him, but he refused to look at me or answer me. He actually got up and walked away while I was talking, and when I tried to gently grab his arm, he yanked it away and stormed off. I had NO idea what he was feeling, and it was impossible for me find out. I think for the first time this week I felt so overwhelmed by all of this, everything that has happened. I was overwhelmed by the fact that I have a kid who I love as my own son, who will be my son, and I had no idea how to reach him when he's hurting. I didn't have the words. Roberto and Grant are back in Veracruz, and I ended up feeling so alone in that moment. The reality of the spiritual battle going on for Will's life was tangible. I could sense Satan trying to pull a shroud over my son as I watched helplessly. What came next was slightly unexpected...

I went back downstairs and found a quiet bench in the darkness, and I just started weeping...hard. Through my tears and gasps for breath, I cried out prayers of desperation, but also prayers of victory over my son. I exclaimed to God how helpless I felt, and that I didn't know what I was supposed to do. I prayed for wisdom and strength, and that the wall between my son and I would be broken in Jesus' name. The tears were so intense; my pants actually became soaked as I held my head in my hands. It wasn't just that moment, it was everything. It was the culmination of all things in my life, the past, present and future all colliding with enough force to jolt my very soul. I can't remember ever weeping so hard.

And then it happened...

I felt two warm hands on mine. I looked up and through my tears I saw my son. He looked at me for a moment, and with tears in his eyes he embraced me with all his strength. I asked him to forgive me, and he did the same. And so there we were, in middle of Central America, holding on to each other for dear life, with an awareness that Jesus was holding on both of us with the same intensity. I gently whispered "thank you Jesus" into the air, with a renewed confidence that the softest prayer was enough to shake heaven itself. And heaven poured down exactly what we needed: a peace that passed our limited understanding.

In the moments that followed, Will was finally able to express his feelings in the way most comfortable for him...with a letter. He wrote simply:

“Hello father, the reason that I write is you to ask you to forgive me because me acted badly with you. I hope that you can forgive me and you don't think that I was angry with you. Thanks, and I hope you understand. I love you father”

What a ride…

Messages For Will

2007-10-06T09:11:00.000-06:00

If you would like to send any messages to Will, just post them here and I'll make sure he gets them! Thanks again for all the prayers and support.

Another Miracle

2007-10-05T18:15:00.001-06:00

I'm sitting here with Will right now, and Grant and Roberto have gone to Veracruz for the night. So it's father/son night tonight! The first ever! We went to the market to get some ice cream, and then came back and watched some soccer on TV. By the way, in case anyone is curious, Will's shirt size a men's small or youth XL, 28-30 waist size for pants, his shoe size is around 8.5-9, depending on the shoes, he loves anything to do with soccer, Manchester United, Valencia, and Argentina are his fav teams, he loves shortbread and apples, and his fav ice cream flavour is chocolate. Pretty solid hey?

We played some intense soccer in the dining room of the PROVADENIC tonight, and man does that kid get sweaty quickly! Within 5 minutes he is absolutely soaked and dripping. In this heat I didn't fare too much better. Will beat me quite easily, but my favourite part was the spirited wrestling match that ensued following the match. I let him pin me, at least that's the story I'm sticking too...It's almost time for supper now. Will's listening to Christian reggaton on my iPod, and I have to keep asking him to turn down the volume. (are you getting board of all this yet!! It may seem mundane, but for me it's a whole new world.)

Later we are going to watch a movie on my laptop, since I brought some DVD's with a spanish audio track and English subtitles. That should be fun. Oh yeah, did I tell you about the time that Will was practicing saying his name?: Will Daniel Thiessen. Or the time he asked, "Father, does your house have a pool?" I am treasuring every moment I have, and I thank God for them.

And finally, the document that I needed from Mi Familia was supposed to be ready by Monday. But today we went to the office to get some names and official titles and address, etc, and Leyla, my case worker for Mi Familia decided to get it right then. So I now have an official document from the government of Nicaragua stating that they have me on file and that they will process my adoption application! Another answer to prayer. Normally the government won't release documents until much later on in the process.

Will just started singing along to the music in his earphones, and now he's dancing. 9 months ago he would barely look anyone in the eye, or speak a word...now he's dancing again.

He's dancing again.

Our Breakfast (a facebook video)

2007-10-05T09:09:00.000-06:00

Please Pray

2007-10-04T12:06:00.001-06:00

I just came from speaking with my lawyer and Mi Familia. It looks like I may not be able to get the mother's signature on the consent paper before I leave. Will's birth certificate was processed with an incorrect last name, so it doesn't match his mother's. So we have to go to a court and legally correct this. my lawyer said sometimes this process can last up to 3 months, so that makes me nervous. I really need that document with the mother's signature in order to move forward. I'm not sure that our government will allow me to proceed without it. So this is a huge prayer request. We also need to acquire a bunch of other names and documents for Mi Familia's file. Thankfully, Will's birth father's death certificate was registered with the government, otherwise that would have to go to trial as well. SO many things to think about right now. Also, Roberto will need to stay until Monday in order to help me process all these things. That means I'll need to fly him back to Costa Rica so he can return to his studies. I'm running out of money, and I don't know how I'll pay for the flight. VISA must be loving me right about now! So please keep things in your prayers.

Also, last night Will's aunt explained that there have been 5 men in the family who have been murdered without reason, Will's birth father included. There seems to be some kind of generational curse on this family. Now I don't pretend to know alot about that kind of thing, but it drives me to pray harder for my son, that any chains or bondage would be broken in the name of Jesus. Please pray for that as well, as it is evident there is a battle going on for this boy.

In happier news, Will finished his homework and got caught up with the classes he missed. So last night we went shopping! His current shoes were pretty beaten up and ripped, so I bought some new kicks for him. Later we came back to the PROVADENIC and he wrote a letter for Mi Famila and for our government to reveal his thoughts and feelings about this whole process. It was so cute watching him write. In the letter he said that he wants me to be the dad he never had, and that he already loves me like his father. It was almost too much for me to take. God is doing some amazing things, and there are many challenges ahead.

Being Called Father For The First Time

2007-10-03T19:43:00.000-06:00

It happened without warning. I was down on the main level of the PROVADENIC, and Will was up on the balcony. Suddenly, I heard him call to me, "Father, Father..." My heart skipped a beat as I became aware of what just happened. I looked up and there he was, perched against the rail, huge smile on his face, arms extended and pretending to fly. It's a moment burned into my memory.

In other news, (it's so hard to bring you all up to speed on things, everything happens so fast), Will's aunt was able to find Will's mother. This in itself is a miracle. We really need the mother's signature to release Will into this process, both from Mi Familia's (the Nicaraguan Ministry of the Family) side and from our government's. This is crucial, and we have been praying that the mother wouldn't suddenly pull a power trip and refuse to sign. We talked with the aunt yesterday, and she said that Will's mother has agreed to sign any papers she needs to! Praise God. Yet another answer to prayer. having the mother's signature will definitely help this process along, in fact, it can't really happen without it. I am so thankful for God's continuing faithfulness, and the strength he has provided every day. Thank you for all you prayers and support. You'll never know how much it means while I'm in the middle of this fight for Will's life. God bless.

Mealtimes, and the First Shave

2007-10-02T18:43:00.000-06:00

Ok, so at mealtimes together, Will is very quiet, and I couldn't figure out why. Then Roberto reminded me that mealtimes in Nicaragua are different than in Canada. Families don't generally talk about the day or visit during meals. So this is a new concept for Will. So this will happen over time I think. I did do the fatherly thing and I turned off the TV in the PROVADENIC dining room at breakfast time, and I made Will clear the table!

Will got into Grant's shaving foam and decided to have a go...he didn't really need it, but it sure was fun to watch. God keeps giving us these crazy wonderful experiences together, and I am still trying to process it all.

p.s. I'm writing this in a large shopping mall...as I was finishing, Will came up to me and said, "Father, can a get some ice cream?" So being a complete mush, I gave him some money, and he just ran to the ice cream store with a big grin on his face. I'm loving this. (I did tell him to bring me the change though!)

Time With My Son

2007-10-02T08:41:00.000-06:00

The last few days have been a blur. It's hard to describe what's been unfolding here. All I know that is that I am growing to love my son more each day, Prayers are being answered before I even have the chanced to utter them. It's been pretty cool.

The rest of Saturday I spent with Will. We went to the mall for a bit and got some lunch. He actually was able to eat in front of me this time. But he was so self-conscious about his face, he constantly put his hand over it or hid in a corner. I thought of buying him a Phantom of the Opera mask, but it didn't seem practical! I told him that hen didn't have to worry, that it looked perfectly fine. It's crazy, I immediately began acting and talking like a dad! We went to a local soccer place where I could see Will come alive. This kid loves soccer so much. I got really sweaty as I tried to outplay Will, which proved very difficult. Oh yeah, I got sacked twice, so that was really fun.

In the evening we went back to the mall for some supper, before heading to a movie. It was so sweet watching Will begin to relax and have fun. He began practicing the few English words he knew, and began asking me alot of questions about what life in Canada is like. I can see that perhaps the reality of what's happening is beginning to sink in. At one point he even threw my arm around his neck as we walked. Truthfully, I wasn't expecting this kind of response so soon.

Will came back to the PROVADENIC for the night, so it was more opportunity to build my relationship with him. Before bed I was able to hold his hand and pray for him and tell him again that I love him. It was a beautiful, if not completely surreal moment in time. My boy will spend the rest of our time with us at the PROVADENIC, so he can remain safe and sound, and so I can cherish every little moment with him.

The internet is sketchy at best, so I'll try to post when I can. Many things have happened since Saturday, so check back for more updates. I am currently trying to write my letter of intention for the Nicaraguan government...this document will be pivotal in the board's ultimate decision. It will also be what will release the documents I need for our government in Canada. So please pray for that in the next few days.

Besides that, stay tuned for the following stories:

"The Journey to Veracruz"
"Clothes Shopping"
"The Fight to Return Will to the Orphanage"
"Meal Times"
"The First Shave"
and
"The First Time Will Called Me Father"

Keep praying!

Seeing Will Again

2007-10-01T08:29:00.000-06:00

Wow…where to start. This will be a long entry, so hold on. I arrived in Managua on Friday night with my buddy Grant. We met up with our translator Roberto and went directly to our hostel, PROVADENIC. We were welcomed by utter darkness. The power grid here is messed up, so PROVADENIC has no power from 5:00pm-10:00pm every day. So that’s a bit annoying. But we had a good time of prayer, and prepared as much as we could for the days ahead. Such uncertainty awaits…

Then on Saturday, we went to find Will at his home. I thought I was going to be extremely anxious, but God granted me a peace that I couldn’t understand. When we arrived, some locals went into the dangerous neighbourhood for me to find him. When Will came around the corner, I couldn’t believe my eyes…the kid I saw before me was not the kid I remembered. He was shirtless, wearing torn and filthy sweat pants, with no shoes, and holding the right side of his face with his hand. As he approached and slowly lowered his hand, I saw that his face was horribly scraped up from his right eye down to his chin. I found out later that he had fallen from a bus only two days before and landed on his face. I thank God for his protection on Will’s life. I sense that the Devil was trying to destroy him. Despite the dirty and scraped up image before me, I embraced Will with all my strength and said, “I love you, I love you”.

We went into his house and met with his Grandmother and his Aunt who care for him. We sat down and Roberto started talking with them. The whole time I would look at Will, he would look back and smile. During the meeting, the intention was to simply find out more about Will’s life and situation, we weren’t going to talk about the adoption yet. But God had other plans. During the meeting, Roberto sensed that the Holy Spirit wanted him to lay it all down right then. Before I could say or do anything, he told the family the real reason I was there! So there it was…all my dreams spilled onto the floor…no time to think…no time for anything…it was all there to see. I was thinking that this would happen many days from now, but no. It just happened.

What unfolded next is almost unbelievable…

The grandma and the Aunt began to weep. Through their tears they whispered, “We’ve been praying for this day to come. We know that we cannot offer Will any kind of life here. And lately Will has been having these crazy dreams. He has told us that one day he will leave Nicaragua and will become successful and will take care of us when he’s older. We didn’t know where these dreams came from, and we didn’t know how they could possibly come true.” And then this: “When Corwin was here in June, we asked Will, ‘Why don’t you ask your godfather to take you to Canada’” Is this actually happening? The grandmother and the aunt have already been thinking of me as Will’s godfather! Will has already had dreams about leaving Nicaragua! Everything we’ve been praying for has come to pass. God is blowing my mind with his faithfulness. And then with tears streaming down her face, the grandmother said, “I have always known that what Will really needs…is a father. We have all the documents we need. Whatever you need us to do, we’ll do.”

I was in a completely different dimension of time and space. It all felt like a dream. I sat beside Will, put my arm around him, and told him that I loved him, and that my dream is to be his dad. He stared to cry. I told him, “I know that this is a really scary thing, and there are many obstacles ahead, but we’ll walk this road together if you are willing.” He nodded his head and said he was…

This is actually happening…

Thanks for your prayers.

Some Pics For Will

2007-09-26T22:02:00.000-06:00

Oh yeah...today I snapped some pics of the soccer centre, so Will can see the kind of facility he might get to play at some day...

The Journey Back

2007-09-26T21:38:00.000-06:00

As I write this, my stomach is turning. The day has almost arrived where I will be face to face with Will, the day when I ask him to be my son. I leave for Nicaragua in about 12 hours, and will be gone until October 10. These next few weeks will be pivotal in realizing this dream.

My buddy Roberto is busing up from Costa Rica tomorrow, and will meet me at the airport on Friday night. Since his first call to me a few days ago, we have spoken again numerous times. He is excited and committed to doing all he can to help me out. He has some connections with lawyers and within government, so he will be a vital lifeline for me. His experience and his knowledge will definitely be a huge asset here. He is also extremely sensitive to God's Spirit, and he has discerned that God allowed our paths to cross many years ago for such a time as this. His whole church community in Costa Rica spent today fasting and praying on Will's and my behalf. I am so thankful and so blessed to have him on my team.

Saturday will be spent trying to arrange meetings with my lawyer. From there I guess I'll have to play it by ear...there are so many unanswered questions: will I have to hunt down Will's birth mom? Does the Grandma have legal custody? What documents will I need? How will I obtain them? Will the Grandma allow this to happen? Will the government officials allow this to proceed? How is Will going to respond to all this? When will be the best time to talk to him?

The list goes on indefinitely in my head, which has caused slight anxiety in the past few days. This is indeed where the rubber meets the road. What goes down in the next two weeks will either make or break this whole thing. Is anyone else feeling nauseas? I will be posting as much as I can as things unravel. If you have facebook, I plan to upload video updates.

Please continue to pray as the pressure becomes overwhelming. I'm guessing I still need about $500 to pay for everything down there, and there are many unknown costs hiding around the corner. But I know that God is faithful and He has provided for me thus far. Thanks for journeying with me!

Roberto To The Rescue

2007-09-18T16:36:00.000-06:00

I got word from my pal Roberto that he is excited to help with the adoption. He has been a translator with my teams in the past, and he's a dear friend. He actually spent some time living at the same orphanage as Will when he was younger. His story is another example of God having a greater plan for a life. He has received support from people in the U.S. who took interest in him when he was younger, and gave him the opportunity to learn English and study in Miami. I have also learned that recently he has assisted a family who adopted 8 kids from the orphanage! So he's another good person to have on my team.

I need to fly him up from Costa Rica to Managua, which will cost about $150. So pray that I could assemble the funds to pay for his flight. He is going to try and contact my lawyer and make arrange...one sec, my cell's ringing...

Wow, ok, so that was actually Roberto who just phoned me...lots of news...stay tuned.

The First One's Finally Over...

2007-09-09T19:12:00.000-06:00

Sorry I'm taking so long to update the blog. Sometimes I think that no one is actually reading it, so it doesn't seem like a priority. But a few friends have been asking, and that's why I started this blog to begin with...so here we go:

My first meeting with my case worker is over. She is the worker I was praying to have assigned to my case. It's crazy, as we talked, it seemed to her that she knew me from somewhere or something, and then realized that I had sang at a wedding of one of her relatives. So there was an instant connection. Through the course of our meeting, we talked very openly and honestly about Will, about my intentions, and about this whole process. By the end of the meeting, I could tell that she had become passionate about bringing Will home as well! She talked about how our job is to work together as a team to bring Will here. So it seems that my prayer for an advocate within our government system has been answered! I am sending in my official application form this week, and contacting a independent practitioner who will begin my home study.

But there were some concerns. As it sits right now, with the limited info about Will and his status, the government officials in Regina are not ready to approve this adoption, because they don't see Will as eligible. They are assuming many things based on very limited info. So my next challenge is to travel to Nicaragua to meet with my lawyer and to acquire all the legal documents I need to prove to our government that Will is eligible for adoption. This journey will also include sitting down with Will and his grandmother, and officially presenting this whole adoption thing to them. This is the meeting I have been dreaming about and fearing for the last 2 months.

So my plan is to leave the last week of September and return in early October. I still don't have all the funds I need for this trip and for my legal fees down there, so please pray that that money would come in somehow. Continue to pray for Will and his Grandma as the day approaches when I will talk face to face about this dream we share. And pray that I will be able to acquire all the necessary documents I need to convince our government that Will is eligible for adoption. And we can thank God for answering prayer, and giving me a wonderful case worker who is passionate about bringing Will home! I will update again before I leave. Thanks again!

Big Meeting

2007-08-27T21:20:00.001-06:00

Well, tomorrow is the big day. I have my first official meeting with my adoption case worker at 1:00pm. I have only spoken with her on the phone, and I am both anxious and excited to meet her in person. This is an advocate that I desperately need right now. I will officially fill out my application for intercountry adoption, and then the real work will begin. Please pray for me and this meeting, that it would go smoothly, and that my case worker will sense my passion and my genuine spirit.

I can't explain how badly I want this process to begin. I feel like I have been in limbo these past weeks, and all the while Wilbur is trying to get through each day. I pray for him so much, some nights I can't sleep and find myself walking around my neighbourhood in the dead of night, for hours at a time, praying constantly for Will and for this process. Is it really possible? Can this really happen? Am I delusional to think that everything will work out? The thoughts and fears consume virtually every moment of my life.

I spoke with Will again last week and told him I am coming to see him soon. He asked what day and if I would come to his house. he still has no idea of what has been going on here. Please continue to pray that God will touch his mind and heart with dreams and visions, and that he will be ready to accept the invitation when the time comes. Hearing his voice brings both reassurance, and a deeper sense of urgency. I love my 'son' so much, and I desperately want to bring him home. Thanks again for your prayers.

Answer to Prayer

2007-08-07T17:10:00.000-06:00

Today was the day I phoned Social Services to talk to an adoption case worker. I had been praying for this for a long time, that God would send me someone who would fight for Will and me. I had been referred to someone through some friends who had gone through this process. So she was the first one I phoned. My heart sank a bit as she told me she was no longer in that specific department. But for some reason, she decided to get more information and by the end of our discussion, she was on the case! I am unsure how much of the case she will handle, but she already seems very interested in my story. She also seems like she would be the kind of person who become my advocate throughout this process. What an amazing answer to prayer.

She mentioned some potential obstacles in dealing with Nicaragua, but she later phoned to tell me that she was feeling confident and that I could come in and begin the application process. It is really starting to unfold now. I need to do some digging to clarify some 'orphan definition' details, to ensure that our federal government will allow the immigration and citizenship part. So pray that tomorrow I can find out some answers.

God is good.

The Phone Call

2007-08-05T00:06:00.000-06:00

Before I get to the heart of this post, I need to tell you that the lady who e-mailed me a few days ago gave me a few more answers...saying the the process will be difficult, but with faith it is possible. I don't think she knows every part of Nicaraguan adoption law, in fact, I'm not even sure who she is...so i can't jump to conclusions. I feel slightly better now, but I am thinking that I may need to get myself back to Nicaragua sooner than I thought to start getting some definite answers. Not knowing has been one of the toughest parts of this journey.

But in other exciting news, I was actually able to speak with Wilbur this evening! When I last saw him in June, I bought him a cheap $22 cell phone with 100 minutes on it. My hope was that this cell phone would allow me to connect with Will throughout the year. Over the past month I had been unsuccessful in getting through, and I was becoming concerned that the phone had been stolen or perhaps all the minutes had run out. But when I tried again this afternoon, I received a glimmer of hope. A lady answered the phone, and when I asked for Will, she said he'd be back in 15 minutes. I finally had confirmation that Will was ok and that he still had possession of the phone!

When I called this evening the lady answered again, but this time when I said hello, she immediately called for Wilbur...the next thing I heard was an excited Will saying, "Hello, Hello, Hello?" It was so amazing to hear his voice and know that he was ok. We had a short conversation, but it was enough time for me to tell him that I pray for him everyday and that I am looking forward to seeing him again. I told him that I have some very important things to discuss with him. (he has no idea...) He told me he missed me and that he loved me. I am left with a sense of relief, and a heightened sense of urgency. This is all becoming very real.

I'd ask that in the next few days you could pray for Will and his grandma. Even though he doesn't know yet about this whole adoption thing, pray that our short conversation tonight will be enough to spark some thoughts and ideas in his mind about what life would be like here. Pray that tonight and tomorrow night while they sleep, that the Holy Spirit would give Will and his grandma dreams and visions of an unimaginable future. Pray that Will would know that he is loved and treasured by so many people. And pray that God would protect his mind, his heart, and his body from harm. Thank you for your prayers.

Here come the roadblocks...

2007-08-02T11:42:00.001-06:00

My morning has been spent with my stomach in knots. I received an e-mail from a lady at the orphanage in Nicaragua. Her words have left me confused and anxious. Because of the difficulty in translating the e-mail, what she said and what she meant could be different. I am so confused.

At one point she says the government won't allow the adoption, but then goes on to say it is a long process, and then she lists all the government required documents. At the end she either says that I should be in Nicaragua to initiate the process, or possibly that I need to remain in Nicaragua during the entire process (I am unsure as to what she is saying exactly)

As well, she says that I need to be married. However, I was reading the Nicaragua Adoption Law online, and it says singles are accepted.

So my mind is racing, and I don't want to allow myself to become too skeptical that this whole thing can never happen. I still believe that God is in control, and I need to trust him and keep moving. I've asked this lady to clarify some of these things, so when she does, I will post again.

I'm so scared right now. Please pray for peace and assurance. Thanks

Corwin

The Journey Begins

2007-07-30T21:04:00.000-06:00

Sometimes the story of your life takes an unexpected turn. You suddenly find yourself in unfamiliar territory, and with both anticipation and sheer terror, you take your first steps. Who would have guessed that the pages of my story would bring me here?

If you are at bewildered at this point, let me clarify for you. Within the last few weeks, God has made it clear to me that it is time for the next chapter of my life to begin. More specifically, that I am to begin the process of trying to adopt a Nicaraguan orphan who has lost everything...his name is Wilbur. I have known Wilbur for a few years, and ever since our first encounter, I felt an unexplainable connection with him. I didn't know the real significance of that until recently. This past June I found him in the slums of Managua, removed from the safety of the orphanage. I saw him living with a grandmother who is old and sick and who doesn't have the means to care for him. I became aware that Wilbur no longer has a future, and that his flame will slowly burn out. Unless someone does something, Wilbur will become just a statistic...another young life swallowed up by poverty, addiction, and gang violence. Everything inside me screamed out that I could not allow that to happen. I cried out to God asking for answers, asking Him to show me who here in Canada would come to the rescue...who could be Wilbur's hope, who would step up and bring him into their family...

God provided an answer...He told me it was going to be me. (I subsequently had an accident in my pants)...which brings me to today.

As I am coming to terms with this new reality, I am becoming more aware that I cannot walk this road alone. I will need to draw from the amazing community that I have been blessed with. Your strength will become my own. Your prayers will keep me going. So in advance, I thank you and bless you for the role you will play within the pages of this story. The purpose of this blog is to make record of my journey, and to give you specific prayer requests along the way. It is going to be a long and difficult process, and there is no guarantee that the dream will become a reality.

I'm terrified that it won't happen...and I'm terrified that it will. It's a funny place to be really...

So here are my current prayer requests:

1. That I could get a wonderful adoption case worker who will understand my passion and purpose, and who will fight for me and for Wilbur. I need an advocate where it counts.

2. That God would, even now, be moving in the hearts of both Wilbur and his grandmother. I have not presented them with this dream yet, it's been too early in the process. But when the time comes to offer Wilbur this new life, I want him to be ready to accept. So pray that God would already grant him dreams and visions for what might be...

3. That I would be able to pool together the finances that I need. Sources have told me to expect a total cost of between $10,000 - $15,000 when it's all said and done. That's scary, but I know that God's in control.

Thanks for you support and your prayers. Thank you for being part of the team that will bring Wilbur home.

Clear Eyes...Full Heart...Can't Lose.

Corwin